The One Problem Interview: Angela Payne, Founder Leed HR

In this week’s Episode of The One Problem, Angela Payne talks about emotional intelligence and leading.

Hi there. My name is Avil Beckford, and this is the latest episode of The One Problem podcast. There are tons of problems in the world, but we don't want to get overwhelmed. We're going to focus on one problem today. My special guest is Angela Payne. She is the founder of Leed HR, an HR consulting organization. I met her maybe six months or more on LinkedIn. Over to you Angela.

Angela Payne

Hi, Avil. Thank you for having me. It's so nice to be able to talk to your readers today. The one problem that we focus on at Leed is helping leaders show up better and help them lead well through emotional intelligence. And emotional intelligence is one of the topics, and one of the skills that all leaders need to have. And it is a skill. So, it's something that people can develop over time. They can learn the skill. It's not like you're born with emotional intelligence, or you're not born with emotional intelligence.

Rather, there are competencies that live inside emotional intelligence that you can practice and work on. So those would include things like your assertiveness, your ability to manage stress or stress tolerance, optimism, empathy. And you see that leaders around the world really need to be working on many of these over time. People come to work to work for great bosses. Some of the work that we do is about helping them grow those skills. If you look at a skill like, for example, assertiveness or a competency like assertiveness. There are several ways that leaders can think about if they're being able to be assertive.

The One Problem Interview with Angela Payne: How to Lead Well being Emotionally Intelligence

It's really the space between being able to express yourself, your needs, and being able to understand others needs. And so, this ability to say what you need to say is the crux of assertiveness. A way to do this and think about this is you could start with what we call the ABCs of assertiveness, which is I feel, and then you speak your truth or share the impact of whatever the person is making you feel. I feel that that was upsetting me because of, which is your trigger or the stimulus or whatever that was.

Angela Payne

And then you could go to C, which is what I'd like to see, or what I would like to be different, would be, and explain what that is, and then invite them to share back to you, so that you can ensure that you've got them in the conversation, which is D. How do you feel when I say that? Or what is your perspective really to invite dialogue by asking them about their perspective? It's a quick tool to be able to say what needs to be said. While also then inviting dialogue and asking a person for their perspective so that you can have a great exchange.

Another one is thinking about ways that you can manage your stress or your stress tolerance. And so, again, this is one that many leaders sometimes can struggle with really how to self-care, how to make sure that they're in a good place in order to be good for the people that they lead. A couple of the things that we teach around stress tolerance is really to take the time to self-care, whether that's exercise or meditation. And lots of these things are ways to do that.

But another way to do that is to think about building a ritual, and especially if you're working from home, or you've got a work from home, and work at home. These lines are completely blurred for you. So the way to be able to perhaps manage that stress of work and that to be able to show up as a good leader is to build a ritual into your day. Some of our clients have built rituals like being deliberate about how you transition from your workspace to your home space.

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Angela Payne

Before, I had the drive home, which would take almost an hour. And so that would be a way that I could manage my stress, reflect on my day, all these kinds of things. Now that's a minute from my kitchen. So certainly, I'd need to now build rituals into my day to help me manage that. And that means for me that I'm very deliberate about taking off my shoes, going to get a coffee, taking five minutes before I just transition into making dinner or talking to my kids.

And so that's a way when you build in a deliberate ritual to help your mind switch from one thing to another so that you can leave your work at work, and you can hopefully help be present in the moment in your personal life. Those are two ways to really work on the competencies of emotional intelligence. One being assertiveness, the other one being stress tolerance. Hopefully, that was helpful.

Avil Beckford

Yeah. This was very helpful. And it made me think, because the solutions are so simple, and it's easy for you to intentionally incorporate into your day and your work, especially the idea of transitioning from work to home. So, you are in the same space. And I like the idea of having rituals.

Angela Payne

Yes. Well, hopefully people can practice a couple of those mindfulness techniques and being self-aware of them is really one additional competency of emotional intelligence. So, it's a way to start there and then be deliberate in the way that you actually action those.

Avil Beckford

Thank you so much, Angela. This has been wonderful.

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