Interviewee Name: David Gray
Company Name: DSG Associates
Website: http://www.davidgraycoach.com
Avil Beckford: How do you integrate your personal and professional life?
David Gray: My personal and professional life are seamless in the sense that I work almost every day and I set my own hours, so one blends into the other in that respect. On the other hand, I make a very clear distinction between clients and friends. Sometimes one becomes the other and vice versa, but for the most part my private life is just that.
Avil Beckford: What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?
David Gray: I regret not having traveled the world when I was in my twenties instead of jumping right into a career.
Avil Beckford: What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?
David Gray:
- Treat everyone as a friend unless or until they give you reason not to do so
- Seek to understand and only then to be understood
- Be completely trustworthy, as trust is the foundation for all true relationships
- Be true to yourself
- Treat everyone with dignity and respect, but be especially gentle with the old, the young, the weak and the less fortunate
Avil Beckford: When you have some down time, how do you spend it?
David Gray: I spend my “down-time” in one of four ways: thinking/reflecting on my own; working out physically at the gym or at home; reading; with close friends, usually one-to-one.
Avil Beckford: What process do you use to generate great ideas?
David Gray: Take the situation, consider the conventional wisdom and then try to turn it on its head and see what comes up. In other words, think in a consciously contrarian style.
Avil Beckford: How do you define success?
David Gray: Success as I define it is an intensely personal and individual reality. For me personally, success fundamentally consists in being true to my own ideals and life philosophy while engaging in a genuine way with clients and friends such that they feel enriched for having spent time with me.
Avil Beckford: In your opinion what’s the formula for success?
David Gray: The formula for success is simple: Chase your dreams, not other people's ideas of success.
Avil Beckford: What does it take to succeed in your field?
David Gray: To be successful in my field one typically needs empathy, compassion, a conscientious work ethic and a background in HR. However, to be truly outstanding one additionally needs a great degree of life history in a variety of business settings as well as a high degree of intuitive and innovative intelligence in order to be able to work with people from numerous diverse backgrounds who are each struggling with very individual career and life challenges. In a word, one needs wisdom. And typically, that can only be accumulated over a long period of time after encountering a variety of challenging situations in one's own career and life.
Avil Beckford: Which one book had a profound impact on your life?
David Gray: Hero of a Thousand Faces by the great mythologist, Joseph Campbell. He taught me to ‘follow my bliss.'
Avil Beckford: If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are five books that you would like to have with you and why? Give a brief summary of each book.
David Gray:
- Don Quixote, by Miguel De Cervantes: The first modern novel, this book revolutionized the imaginative approach to the then core myth of Chivalry, itself a central concept in most European's self-construct. This book reminds us never to take at face value the assumptions of the society in which we happen to live because of vagaries of our birth in a particular geographical space, social context and time.
- The Shield of Achilles: War, Peace and the Course of History, by Philip Bobbitt. An erudite and sweeping review of European history until the 19th century and then an analysis of world history in the 20th and early 21st centuries viewed from the dual perspectives of Law and War. This book provides a context within which to grasp the complex geopolitics of the world we currently live in.
- The Poetry of Robert Frost: All eleven of his books – complete, edited by Edward Connery Lathem. This book reminds one that the only life worth living is one including a degree of reflection.
- The Measure of a Man: a Spiritual Autobiography – Sidney Poitier. This book teaches a man how to live as a man. In a day and age when men are increasingly out of touch with their essential masculinity, Poitier's story of his personal challenges, triumphs and philosophy of life reads like a melodic breath of very fresh air.
- Lincoln's Melancholy: How Depression Challenged a President and Fuelled His Greatness, by Joshua Wolf Shenk. A biography that reads like a detective novel. The real Lincoln is far more fascinating and inspiring than the manufactured American myth of the man. Like Poitier's book, this one provides insights into what is possible to achieve and, far more importantly, what it means to live life as a man who is true to his own vision, come hell or high water. Interestingly, in Lincoln's case it was the hellfire of a bullet, whereas for Poitier it was a near-death experience with high water.
Avil Beckford: If you had a personal genie and she gave you one wish, what would you wish for? Or, if I gave you a magic wand, what would you use it for?
David Gray: If I could have one wish granted, it would be to have all of my future wishes granted on a reversible (if unintended consequences ensued) basis. But seriously…it would be to see President Obama lead the world, by astute understanding and management of long-range American foreign affairs interests, out of the political and economic bankruptcy created by the current American Administration and into a new era of relative peace and stability.
Avil Beckford: Complete the following, I am happy when…..
David Gray: I am happ(iest) when surrounded by a few very close friends, discussing world affairs, telling jokes, enjoying the warmth of each other's company and generally having a good laugh while stretching our minds.
About David Gray
David has advised executive clients based in Canada, the UK, Europe and Asia. In addition to his own consulting practice, David serves as President of the Board, Toronto Chapter of the Association of Career Professionals International (ACP International), and is a member of the Strategic Leadership Forum (GTA).
Prior to working as a career and strategic leadership consultant, David held management positions in Canada and the UK in business & technology consulting, and started up and managed two Divisions in Canada for a blue chip, global financial services organization.
David’s quiet, incisive, highly personalized approach has inspired many executives and entrepreneurs who are in process of redefining strategic paradigms to realize growth opportunities on both a business and personal level.
How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let's keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below.
Book links are affiliate links.
