Identifying the right Mentor
The volume of comment and messages received in recent weeks, clearly shows that my 4-part mentorship series in collaboration with the Invisible Mentor has not covered all bases (Mentorship Program Relevance Today: Against a backdrop of shifting mentee requirement)! The missing gap, distilled from diverse questions, would be dealing with the ability of the mentee to identify the right mentor!
“How do I know what type of mentor to look for?”
“What can I do to ensure I have the right mentor?”
As a firm believer that identifying and responding to specific behavior is less complicated and more reliable than permanently labeling people and categorizing situations, it is dangerous to assume or infer that individuals will always behave in a certain way… just because they did so in the past.
In this spirit, I continue to successfully rely on four basic character states that I believe underpin all human behavior/interaction in infinitely variable combinations, at any point in time:
Bearing in mind that Mentorship is the process of Identifying, Understanding, Engaging and Empowering others, an appropriate mentor will respond to mentee behavior at any point in their relationship.
Rational behavior is a pre-requisite; Balanced and effective interaction follows when a person is Rationally Active, Rationally Emotional & Rationally Passive…. In other words, someone who will choose what behavior is required at any given moment – When to be Active… when to be Emotional… when to be Passive!
Oftentimes people require a mentor when under emotional strain. Perhaps underutilization of ability, lack of acknowledgment, or organizational change has perhaps taken their toll on mentee confidence/self-esteem. Such a mentee would require a Rationally Active, take charge type of mentor, with sufficient empathy to subjectively acknowledge mentee circumstance.
Inversely an angry, frustrated individual would likely prefer a quieter Rationally Passive Mentor with the capacity to absorb rants, tirades etc. obviously within defined limits.
A more passive, reticent individual will definitely require a Pro-Active Mentor, with preparedness to ask, suggest, poke and prod when required…. With sufficient empathy to know when to back off…!
For me, most mentees today are mired in rationality… Complying with what others expect them to say and do. Political correctness seems to serve a more wall-paper type function than a code of behavior that accommodates diversity. It follows then that an ideal Mentor will be someone who encourages the innate Active, Emotional & Passive side in the mentee to become apparent … obviously within Rational limitations.
The combinations are endless and evolving!
Suffice to say, an effective mentor will enable the mentee to subjectively be themselves within objectivecircumstance!
About Rodger Harding
Rodger is a dynamic, free thinking, Business Leadership Consultant. His fierce belief in who/what people are, rather than who/what they are expected to be, has resulted in a consistent demand for his career transition and mentorship expertise from a diverse client base.
His thriving Toronto based practice draws on an extensive business, legal, diplomatic and military experience accumulated internationally over two decades. His fields of expertise are Leadership, Career Transition, Corporate Intelligence Awareness and Conflict Management/Mediation.
Rodger is proud of his ability to access individual contribution within the larger framework of business objectives. His ability to interact effectively with people from all walks of life derives from an interesting career evolution that has ranged from the sophisticated diplomatic lifestyle of Paris, France, to the survival of death threats from mercenaries in the Indian Ocean, as well as the management of multi-million dollar aid projects.
At all times, he highlights the unique role of the individual to contribute to the ongoing evolution of good business.
To find out more about his successful Toronto based consultancy, visit www.HardingIntl.com