In mentoring relationships, mentors guide and advise their protégés. The most successful mentorship partnerships are high trust relationships, where those involved, value and respect each other.
- Mentors advise their protégés but they cannot force them to accept the advice. Ever heard of the saying, you can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink it? It’s something like that. Protégés have the right to decide if the advice they receive is in their best interest.
- Mentors and protégés must listen actively to each other, which helps them to understand who they are and their limitations. A mentor should never try to shape her protégé into a carbon copy of herself. Relationships are about give and take, therefore protégés should seek ways to say thank you to their mentors who are investing their time and knowledge. However, as a mentor, you have committed to the relationship, and it’s your responsibility to help you protégé achieve her stated mentorship goals.
- Many times, but not always, the power balance in a mentorship relationship is skewed in favour of the mentor, who is often at a higher level in her career. Honor and value the mentorship relationship and never view your protégé as your slave who is at your beck and call. Do not ask her to work on projects that will only benefit yourself, or on tasks that will take her away from her mentorship goals.
Great mentors already know this, but it never hurts to acknowledge the elephant in the room and clear the air. Please share your thoughts on how we should respond to situations where mentors and protégés do not honor their mentorship relationships.
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