The Invisible Mentor

Posts Tagged ‘Mentor Yourself’

Interviewee Name: Kamel Hothi, Director

Company Name: Lloyds Banking Group

Website: http://www.lloydsbankinggroup.com

Avil Beckford: Tell me a little bit about yourself.

Kamel Hothi: I’ve been working for 32 years in the banking world. I’m a Director at Lloyds Banking Group. I’m married, I have two children and I live in a very strict Indian traditional family.

Avil Beckford: What’s a typical day like for you?

Kamel Hothi: Very, very busy. To be honest, there is no me-time. I tend to leave the house at about 6:30 to get into the office in London (UK). It’s about an hour and a half’s drive. I look after three remits – the Asian market, as well as the world’s internal infrastructure between us and corporate banking, and I also support the procurement for supply to the Group so we work on those, then tend to go home around 7:30, 8:00 pm. I arrive home at about 9 pm and head straight to the kitchen, and see what needs to be done. I get to bed around 12:00 am and I’m back again in the morning.

Avil Beckford: How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

Kamel Hothi: I think that’s a difficult one. One goes through the peaks and troughs of life and I divide my life very much at work and home and I suppose at work I like to be very structured. I need to know exactly what I have to achieve at the end of the year, what success looks like for me, and see if I can carve that down into bite-sized chunks and monitor and track that. I’m a bit of a control freak, so as long as I know what I need to achieve that keeps me motivated because I know I’m achieving the bits that I need to do.

And at home, it’s making sure that the family gets attention, that they are on track. I’ve got two children so I ensure I’m giving them my time and that’s important to me so I try to do that on the weekend as much as I can, trying to find a couple of hours to make sure that I stay in touch with them. And if I know about their life that keeps me motivated that they are doing the right thing.

Avil Beckford: If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

Kamel Hothi: Coming from a very different culture, we came from India to the UK without speaking a word of English and being brought up in a very traditional household where the females didn’t really have a career. So I was very fortunate to get into banking and convinced my parents to allow me to continue. But I had other aspirations and I wanted to go to university and I wanted to do further studying but I was very nervous about approaching those subjects with my parents because it’s such a complete no-no area. Now looking back, I wish I had the confidence to address these issues and have a conversation with them, partly to reassure them that I wasn’t going to rock the traditional boat, it was just that I had these burning ambitions that maybe my other siblings didn’t have. But certainly better communication with the family I think would have been much better for me when I was younger.

I feel I’ve still got so much more to give and I’m at a crossroads in my career now after 32 years in banking. I love educating people. I love mentoring and I’m certain that’s the route going forward in the future. I’d like to get involved with some charity. So I like bringing people together, and I work better in collaboration with businesses and business units, that’s where my skill is really, so I don’t work very well in silos. I think that’s where I want to go and develop further in my next stage of life.

Avil Beckford: What’s the most important business or other discovery you’ve made in the past year?

Kamel Hothi: I suppose in banking I would say it’s IT (Information Technology). It has completely changed the way that we work, whether it’s from emailing to the online banking system, that’s certainly made the pace so much faster and much hungrier and somewhat easier to communicate. It also has some negative downfalls because when people are on holidays the Blackberry is constantly on, you’re always in touch, it’s a good thing but also a bad thing that the pace of change is so fast that you have to constantly be on the run. So I would say that IT is the biggest change in our industry.

Avil Beckford: What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

Kamel Hothi:

1. For banking I would say it’s what’s happened in the financial world. The world is shrinking so an impact in America or Asia will have a huge impact on our business so that’s something that’s even more crucial as we speak now.
2. Regulation is getting really tight and very difficult to operate in the areas that we do.
3. And now with times changing with acquisitions and mergers, I’ve gone through three in my lifetime in a huge organization. You never know what’s on the horizon with Asia growing so fast. Some of it is exciting but certainly it impacts the business and the branding and therefore lots of changes are happening.

Avil Beckford: What’s unique about the service that you provide?

Kamel Hothi: What I’m really good at is building strategies, so it’s really understanding what the business case is for a particular strategy, what are the barriers, how can these be overcome, finding and implementing the solution. That’s what makes me unique and that what I bring to the forefront. And that’s what I’m known for. I was the architect behind the Asian strategy for Lloyds Bank and I’m really proud of the legacy that I’ll hopefully leave behind.

Avil Beckford: What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

Kamel Hothi: It is really two things. Working in a huge organization you do find that divisions tend to work in silos, and it’s very much about them and their particular business, whereas our customers only obviously see the whole brand. It’s ensuring that these divisions are working together, I would say that’s what I’m very good at. I tend to work with the whole group and think of the whole group as a whole and I totally empathize with the customer, and our customers are at the forefront of everything that I try to do.

This also leads to the second thing in that sometimes I get frustrated with my colleagues with the follow-through — when you are networking, making sure that the commitments that you’ve made, that they are followed through right to completion, and it’s the speed of follow through. I’m proud of myself to make sure that my credentials say that I’ll get back as quickly as I can once I’ve met all the promises that I’ve made.

Avil Beckford: Describe a major business or other challenge you had and how you resolved it. What kind of lessons did you learn in the process?

Kamel Hothi: I come from a very Jekyll and Hyde lifestyle, that I live at home in a very traditional culture to the corporate world that I operate in, in the daytime job. That is the biggest challenge, balancing those two different worlds and keeping both of them content and the people that are my key stakeholders both at work and at home, and that they are aware of what I do and are appreciative of what I try to deliver.

It is a totally different world, from one end I’m standing and having a board meeting with a room full of men, and then going home and being the daughter-in-law in a very different household where it’s still a quite sexist environment, but it’s the culture I was brought up with. I would say that my biggest challenge is constantly battling with the differences and helping both of them move slowly forward into the world.

One of the things that’s helping me and helping others around me to understand the cultural differences and if I look at myself earlier, at my first 15 years in banking, it was hugely challenging. I felt I was really delivering the results, I felt I worked hard but just couldn’t understand why my colleagues were either promoted above me or quicker, and it wasn’t until later in life that I realized that it was really those first impressions and things and the subconscious behaviours you bring to work.

As I’ve said before, I come from a very traditional background where it is seen as keep your voice very feminine, behave very feminine and you don’t challenge back and shouldn’t be assertive, and you respect your elders. And so subconsciously you bring those behaviours into work and although I was working hard and producing 200 percent of my results, but because I was so respectful, and my voice was quite timid, my manager translated that to being, she is not hungry, she is not assertive enough to be a leader and therefore why move her, she is doing the results for me and not giving me a hard time. I won’t promote her.

So it’s really understanding what is in fact the opposite, and a number of times when I was early in my career would result in me becoming bitter and rather than challenging back, would either move divisions or find another role. Now I coach other ethnic minorities across the organization to help them understand their own differences, and then once you’ve understood what the differences are then you can make an informed choice, but I also educate line managers, mainstream managers that they may have a burning star amongst their employees, who may not be shining in their eyes as they see them but actually once you give them the empowerment, give them the go ahead, they could be one of their biggest talent pool amongst their employees.

Avil Beckford: Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

Kamel Hothi: I would say my biggest break was from my line manager going back three lines ago, a gentleman by the name of Arif Mushtaq. He was parachuted in from another company into Lloyds Bank. I encountered him when I was setting up the effort for the Ethnic Minority Network, and he was the one who sponsored the event. It was great to meet Arif. When we started discussing the event and he heard some of my views and ideas he really encouraged me to take a risk. He had faith, he saw something in me that I suppose other people didn’t see and so that encouraged me to take a risk from the position. Yes I could have lost my job. He gave me a blank sheet of paper and said he would support me, and to be honest, that empowerment was the best gift I have ever had. It increased my confidence and since then I have never looked back, so I’m really grateful to Arif.

Avil Beckford: Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

Kamel Hothi: Going on the personal front, both at work and at home in the early stages of my career was having the courage to stand up for myself. I knew that I had a burning ambition in my stomach and didn’t really know how to articulate it. That actually took me several years to get the strength to talk about it or to demonstrate that I wanted to do this, which wouldn’t rock the boat at home. But also at work, there were a number of promotions that I allowed to pass me by without questioning and challenging the lines, why they made the decisions. I had no information on their outcomes, so I would say that my biggest failure in the beginning is not talking up and giving myself the confidence to do that so that’s certainly something I’ve learned over the years and I’ve learned something about myself . And I learnt that when I’m contributing I’m adding value to the organization that I’m working for so that’s given me the confidence to be much more confident in what I do. And I found that therefore the people around me accepted what I do, and certainly at home my family where they were uncomfortable in the past now see it as something they are really proud of.

Avil Beckford: What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

Kamel Hothi: One of my biggest disappointments is that my parents passed away many years ago, so they haven’t witnessed the change in myself and seen the achievements over the last decade that I have done both at work and at home, so that’s always going to be something that you can’t really undo. However, that also helped me to understand that every day is so precious, for me it’s making sure that my children are part of my journey, and they are certainly involved in my career. They encourage me, I encourage them. We talk a lot, I seek their advice on what I’m doing, the next steps I should be taking, so they actually feel they’re the ones that’s been supporting me so they are part of the whole equation.

So for me, my children are very important and we stick together and I want to be a part of their future. We talk a lot, we talk about their future, it’s something in the Indian community that’s not done often. Coming from a first generation where my father was very dominating, discussions that were open were very rare. That’s something we’ve hopefully undone in our family and that we’ve given our children the empowerment to say what they need to say but at the same time we are guarding them and steering them to what’s best for them as well.

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

Kamel Hothi: I think it’s taking the new role in corporate banking. The previous role I had to this one was very comfortable, and one that I was very familiar with. I had been working in that division for a number of years. I got a lot of kudos and people knew who I was and in coming into a division that I had never worked in before, hardly knew any of the executives there, it was a huge jump and starting from scratch again and having to prove myself. It was a tough decision, do I want an easier life or a tough life and I took the tough path but it was a challenge I was prepared to take because I could see the opportunity in that division to help them understand the market that I was being asked to come and help and support them in. That’s where I started the architecture of the Asian strategy and was delighted that it got embedded because it could have easily been thrown out. They accepted it and to this day they are still supporting it.

Avil Beckford: What are three events that helped to shape your life?

Kamel Hothi:

1. I got married at the age of 19 and it was an arranged marriage, which completely changed my life. I was the youngest of six children from a very protective family and all of a sudden parachuted into a very tough environment at the tender age of 19, and in our culture you are married into the extended family, you do not marry an individual.
2. The second was having my children. Balancing work, life, home and children was a huge, difficult task but at the same time it was one of the most rewarding things.
3. The third was coming into corporate banking. I love the role, I love the division, and it has empowered me and opened so many opportunities. Networking in the Asian community, I have met so many special individuals through my daytime job. I wouldn’t be here today if I hadn’t made that particular decision.

Avil Beckford: What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

Kamel Hothi: I would say that it’s writing the Asian strategy for Lloyds Group. It’s wonderful to educate a huge organization like ours to help them understand the Asian market, how to reach out to them, what products we need to develop, the cultural differences, and how to communicate with them, and now we’ve seen leaders in our field in the UK and to know that I was the architect behind that, and am now seen as an ambassador for the company, having attended hundreds of events each year. But at the same time, the reason I’m so proud is I think the community has done so much for the UK, achieved so much, many coming here with no money, working without speaking a word of English then they are now running multimillion pound companies and it’s wonderful through the work I do, through the events that I sponsor to be able to give them a platform to showcase these entrepreneurs who have done so much, and added so much to the UK.

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

Kamel Hothi: I have had a number of mentors I would say, and some were good and some were bad. Most were not what you call formal mentors in the beginning, but certainly people who you admire who you see can add value in different ways. My mother was a huge mentor to me, she helped me to shape my personal life, helped me to focus on the core things to look at, how to overcome when things are not quite going right. And at work, Arif Mushraq was a huge mentor to me, he helped me, and he understood what other people thought were weaknesses, were strengths and he had a real influence on my career.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Kamel Hothi: Believe in yourself and listen to your gut feelings. More people believed in me than I believed in myself. They could see that there was something there, the decisions I made through my career, were very well thought out and balanced. Believe in myself is the message that has come out over and over again.

Avil Beckford: An invisible mentor is a unique leader you can learn things from by observing them from afar, in the capacity of an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Kamel Hothi: Really understand yourself. We can all get on this conveyor belt of pushing for a career, but step off the conveyor belt for a minute and assess where you want to get to. Where do you see yourself in five year’s time? And how do you get there and carve your path both at home and work. I do believe they go hand-in-hand because one can’t do without the other. So have two paths, one for work and one for home, and see them together. Do they match up? Is one conflicting with the other? Life will change accordingly but if you have some visible path to guide you then you can divide that into small chunks on how you are going to get there.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Interviewee Name: Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia, Founder

Company Name: NORSUN Diversity and Cross-Culture Consulting

Website: http://diversity-and-cross-culture.com/

Avil Beckford: Tell me a little bit about yourself.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I am Norwegian, I have lived in Switzerland, Cyprus and the US, now I’m living in France. I am a consultant, trainer and coach – and also mentor on a voluntary basis for the European Professional Women’s Network (EPWN). And I recently started up my company NORSUN Diversity and Cross-Culture Consulting.

Avil Beckford: What’s a typical day like for you?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Not sure I have a typical day yet, as my company is still in the making. But the day always include morning, afternoon and evening walks with my Golden Retriever. The last few months I have been working on three trainings, and recently I have been busy setting up a blog and using Twitter.

Avil Beckford: How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It is rather easy, as my work is something I feel passionately for. Otherwise it is important for me to keep a balance between work and leisure, and this balance keeps me motivated.

Avil Beckford: If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Concerning my business, I would have contacted more large consulting companies to freelance at an earlier stage. The financial market is still tough in the consulting business and if I had more freelancing contacts I think that would have been better.

Avil Beckford: What’s the most important business or other discovery you’ve made in the past year?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It has been a pleasure to discover that the consulting business is very supportive. I had expected fierce competition, whereas what I find is that my “competitors” if you like are very willing to share information and be supportive

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I would say that it’s E-learning, blended learning, more structure – and demand for certification – around what it means to be a coach and mentor

Avil Beckford: When you say blended learning, what do you msn by that?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I mean training that has many different elements so that could mean an e-learning element within the blended learning. It could be that you have to do exercises, or group training combined with more traditional face-to-face training.

Avil Beckford: What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia:

1. The financial market and competition.
   1. It is all about networking and creating trust so that customers choose me despite the above.
2. Gender discussion “fatigue”. By that I mean I have noticed that some people feel tired of the subject “women on boards, leadership.” I think that communication that focuses on a better future for men and women in business and at home is the way to go forward.

Avil Beckford: What’s unique about the service that you provide?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: To do that I have to go back a little. It is proven that a diverse company with an inclusive environment produces better bottom line results. I help businesses increase organisational performance through focus on inclusion, a diverse workforce and a better understanding of working across national cultures.

As a consultant, coach, mentor and trainer, my strength lies in my combination of strategic and operational experience, as well as having worked internationally cross-border and living in different countries. I am a good listener and have a solution-minded attitude.

Avil Beckford: What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I don’t like to focus on what others do badly. But I see a danger in cross-cultural trainers getting too hung up on the theories of intercultural specialists like Trompenaars and Hofstede. Their tools are helpful, as long as one does not forget about individual differences and taking the time to get to know people.

Avil Beckford: Describe a major business or other challenge you had and how you resolved it.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It was actually to get all the paper work done to set up my business. With my cultural background (Norwegian) it is not natural for me to chase people, it is considered rude in my culture. But here in France it is more common to chase people to get things done. I learnt it by doing, and I got it done, but it was hard for me.

Avil Beckford: What lessons did you learn in the process?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Listen to the people who have “inside information” and follow their advice, even if it is difficult to do.

Avil Beckford: Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It wasn’t a big break, but I would like to mention the story. In high school I had a gym teacher that had the ability to “see” people. One time I was going through a difficult time, she saw it without me having to say a word. She asked me if I wanted to talk and I said yes. It was a relief to talk with an adult that showed so much understanding. It is something I have carried with me, the importance of “seeing” people and reaching out a hand. Sometimes I fail, but I try the best I can.

Avil Beckford: Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: One time I did not work well with a superior. I learnt that there may be greater cultural differences than one would expect between neighbouring countries. It forced me to flex my style, it wasn’t comfortable, but it gave better results.

Avil Beckford: What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I rather tend to have many small disappointments, and they come in squadrons, as they say in French. When these periods arrive, I focus on “what happened instead?” “What positive outcome has there been from this disappointment?”

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Well, I think the toughest decisions in life are most likely to be very personal ones. One that I can share was the decision to settle in France with my French husband. I knew that it would be a long process to integrate, as I had to learn the language (which isn’t easy!) and get used to yet another culture. The result is that I have indeed learnt the language, although it took longer than I liked, and I live in a very beautiful country with a wonderful climate – and we live a blessed life.

Avil Beckford: What are three events that helped to shape your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia:

1. The fact that I decided to take an education abroad set the scene for my intercultural experience. I had traveled over longer periods of time before that, but actually spending years abroad gives a stronger impact.
2. My husband. He provides a balance to my life that is amazing.
3. It is rather a personality trait than an event, but it does shape my life; I tend to take calculated risks (e.g. quitting my job before having another one, starting my own business). These risks have brought me exciting challenges (e.g. international job in a large petroleum company).

Avil Beckford: What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I am very proud of a blended learning on working across cultures that I produced (main designer and team leader) in 2009 for a large petroleum company.

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I have had many invisible mentors, and some formal ones. They help me to trigger off new ideas or push me to get done things I already have in mind.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: That they believe in me

Avil Beckford: As an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Follow your interests and don’t give up.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Interviewee Name: John Klotz, President

Company Name: Northwood Mortgage Life Insurance Corporation

Website: http://www.northwoodmortgage.com

John Klotz – Your Invisible Mentor

Avil Beckford: Tell me a little bit about yourself.

I’m an insurance and investment advisor and have been in the industry for close to 20 years. I own my own brokerage.

Avil Beckford: What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

Earlier on in my life, I wanted to go to medical school or something like that, but it wasn’t in the cards for me. I learned about myself in that process that what I really wanted to be if you think about what a physician is, a physician is a trusted advisor regarding your health. It’s someone you go to about your health and generally what he says is supposed to be in your best interest and you should follow the advice. I think if I was to apply that to my life, I would say, as an advisor what you want to do is position yourself as that trusted advisor. So when you want into a doctor’s office they have diplomas on the wall saying basically that finished medical school that they are board certified, and are professional at what they are doing. If you walked into my office you’d see 20 plaques on my wall that would say the same thing.

So I guess a failure for me would be that I didn’t pursue something like that. I found something else and sort of took what I liked about that area and applied it to the profession I’m in now. And I would hope that if people are looking for a financial advisor that they’d want someone who is educated, who’s got designations and carries himself as a professional.

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

I was a Senior Vice President at a downtown firm and was doing extremely well there. I made a decision to leave and form a partnership with Northwood Mortgage to set up their insurance company. It was a big decision because I was doing very well, earning a very comfortable living, and a lot of my expenses were being taken care of. But I knew that in my heart of heart that I wanted to run a brokerage. I wanted to be my own entity. I could stay there and continue to do well, or I could take a chance.

I actually went to my son who at the time was six and I said, “Jeremy, dad has a good job and he is doing really well and he likes the work, however he’ll never be the owner. But he can stay and be very happy or he can take a risk and go out and form his own company, but it might mean that for a while the presents I get you might not be as nice as you were getting before.” And this little six year old kid looks me in the eye and says, “Dad take a risk, go for it.”

I didn’t want to look back on my life and go, “I was scared,” because they have interviewed older people asked them, “What’s your one regret?” and their regret is that they didn’t take enough risks. And here was my shot, and by the way, it hasn’t been total smooth sailing. But now at least I have a lot of answers that I wouldn’t have had, had I stayed put.

Avil Beckford: What are three events that helped to shape your life?

I’m not sure I can answer that but I can say three things that changed my life. I come from a family of professionals. My grandfather was a doctor, my father was a surgeon, my eldest brother is a surgeon, and my two siblings are lawyers. I’m surrounded by people who work really hard. We’re a family that dedicated themselves to being the best, and that sort of moulded me, and I knew that I’d want to be in that circle as well.

I would say my family moulded me not to settle for things, to go for the gusto, and my father had a huge impact on me. My dad died about two years ago at the age of 83, but he worked as surgeon until he was about 81. His health really deteriorated and he really should have left a little earlier. But what I admired about him was that he just loved his work. He loved the interaction and it really killed him to retire.

So I have a real different view of retirement planning than most people. For other people it’s about acquiring a certain number of dollars in the bank and then saying, “Screw off” to everybody. To me retirement planning is not that at all, it is basically finding something that you love, pursuing it, maybe refining it during retirement by not doing as much of it or having more holiday time, but still sticking with your passion.

Avil Beckford: What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

• There are a few of them. One of them was I started a speaking series, Toronto Talks 10 years ago, and I put on an event every month. I’ve never really done a ton of public speaking, but I’ve always wanted to run a speaking series and I remember the first week we got the speaker and we threw out a bunch of emails about it. Fifty people were going to show up and I was going to emcee the thing. I remember being really nervous that first night. I practiced in front of a mirror and went over and over how I was going to present the speaker and what I was going to do. So that was 10 years ago and we hosted about 120 sessions, so I’m really proud that I was able to build something – a speaking series that a lot of people know about. And that’s been a really great thing.

• I’m proud of basically taking a risk and setting up this brokerage here at Northwood Life which took a lot of guts, and I’m still building it and there is still a lot or work to do.

• I’m most proud of my kids, I have two young children and I have a very solid marriage and I’m really proud of that when I see everyone around me divorcing and splitting up. I’ve got the most solid marriage and I have two amazing kids, and I would put this at the top of everything.

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

I’ve always had mentor. One of the mentors I have now is my partner Art Appleberg, who has basically taken Northwood Mortgage the brokerage he started 20 years ago and grew it into a 200 person sales force. We’ve set up a model on the insurance side that is similar to but not identical to the mortgage brokerage business. But I’m trying to follow – Art is full of all this wisdom – how to build a brokerage. He has done it on the brokerage side and I’m doing it on the insurance and investment side. He is a great mentor so it’s always good to go in and tell him what’s working and what’s not. The thing about mentors is that it’s not all about glory. You also have to talk about what’s not working. That’s been really great for me.

I’ve had other mentors along the way. At my last employment the owner and I were very tight and I always talked to him about how I would do things. Mentors have always helped me.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Never say die, constantly improve, and that whole kaizen that the Japanese constantly look for better ways to do things. Always keep your eyes open, always act professionally like I told you about that “Good Loser” letter. That’s professional, if a client says, “I don’t want you as my adviser,” instead of being snotty, respond with a “Good Loser” letter. I never send angry emails, ever. I’ve received them, but I never send them because that’s on record forever.

Avil Beckford: An invisible mentor is a unique leader you can learn things from by observing them from afar, in the capacity of an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

There are different readers, so let’s say I’m thinking about someone who is going into a career. One of the things that I did is that I wrote down a list of the things that I wanted in a career. And I knew when I entered this business that I wanted something with an education path; that was important to me. And I knew that I wanted something where there was no limit to your upside potential. And I knew that I wanted something where I could grow old with my clients so it wasn’t always a new sale every week it was about building relationships. And I didn’t want things like territories, but I wanted to be able to move all over the place. And I wanted something with real scope.

I wrote that 20 years ago, I created that list, I wanted an education path, I wanted a career with no limit on the ceiling, I wanted open territories and I wanted the opportunity to be a professional, to really embrace something. So what I would say to people listening to this is if you are looking at some sort of career, whatever, I would say know what you want because if you know what you want you will pursue it.

One of the failures I had is a job that didn’t work out, they let me go. I was selling office equipment and I didn’t enjoy it. So 20 years ago, I wrote down what I wanted in a new career, so I would say know what you want, write it down and set a plan.

Avil Beckford: How do you integrate your personal and professional life?

A lot of marketing that you do in insurance can be personal. A lot of people join golf clubs to meet people. We ski every weekend. I really try at times to keep my business and personal life separate. I let everyone who I’m friends with know what I’m doing but I try not to be in their face. There are people in my field who can be in your face and that has always bothered me. I definitely try to keep my kids away from the business. I don’t want them to see me as this prospecting animal. You can work all the time in this business, it’s interesting, the people are interesting, and the clients are interesting. My challenge is that I need to turn it off when I go home, and that’s the question I’d like to address. When I go home, I’m there for my kids and my family. We go skiing, I’m there for them and I try and turn it off.

Avil Beckford: What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?

I don’t have any. My life is evolving, I’m proud of it and I’m able to keep my family in a certain lifestyle, I feel professionally fulfilled, I own my own business and I’m good. I don’t have those big regrets.

Avil Beckford: What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?

1. I need to work with people I like, and that’s a great lesson. I’d rather take a lousy opportunity with great people than a great opportunity with lousy people because if you are with great people you’ll synergize, you’ll figure it out, you’ll go forward and you’ll have great fun.
2. Stick-to-it-tiveness  - I’ve been doing this for 20 years and what I’m finding as I get older and mature, instead of being cast to the side I’m getting better and better at it and getting more established.
3. Find something that you love.
4. You can’t judge something right away, you have to give it a year till you can even think about judging it. I wasn’t sure I would love this business, but I wrote down what I wanted and I gave it a year and within two weeks, by the way, of being in the insurance and investment industry I loved it and knew that this was exactly what I wanted to do.
5. Set long term goals and give things a chance.

Avil Beckford: When you have some down time, how do you spend it?

We are a family of skiers, we like to ski. I’m dedicated to my two kids and that’s my downtime and it’s really important for me that they grow up well balanced, respectful and educated and I’ll do anything for them. Unfortunately sometimes I need a little bit more downtime that just for me, so I try to keep physically fit and try to read a lot. I’m constantly taking courses for improvement so that’s kind of my downtime.

Avil Beckford: What process do you use to generate great ideas?

Sometimes just setting time aside to think about them. Great ideas require downtime. It requires just sitting in your office or a beach. I find when I go away on holidays sometimes my best ideas come then.

Avil Beckford: What’s your favourite quotation and why?

Just do it – Nike

Avil Beckford: How do you define success?

I think there are many levels of success. There is this thing called “top of the table” in the business where you are “top of the table” and they say there is no point to be on the top of the table if there is no one there to sit with you. I thought that was great so it’s not just about financial success. I think you need to have family success, and you need to be around people you care about.

Avil Beckford: In your opinion what’s the formula for success?

I think it’s finding something that you are truly passionate about and creating a plan.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

What are your goals for this year? Are they ambitious enough that they will push you beyond your comfort zone? Can you accomplish them by yourself, or do you need a mentor or a coach to assist you? For the past three years, I have had some ambition goals and I haven’t accomplished all of them. Even though I possess superwoman-like characteristics, I realize that I cannot go it alone if I want to attain the kind of success that I’d like.

In November 2010, based on the process in Jinny Ditzler’s Your Best Year Yet, I identified my 10 goals for 2011. These goals are from all areas of my life, and all of them are not major goals. They could be as simple as meeting with a friend every week for dinner or movie (This is to ensure that I am fully interacting with people face-to-face, so on January 8^th I attended the workshop Hymnology 101, which I found quite interesting), and taking vacation to a place I have never been before. But there are two goals on my list that I realize that I need some serious help with, and they are to revamp my book Takes of People Who Get It to include The Invisible Mentor Brand, and start The Invisible Mentor Diamond Club, which will be a membership site.

Tales of People Who Get It was published in 2007, and with anything in life, when you evaluate work that you have done, you inevitably see things that you could have done differently. That only means that you are growing and experiencing the wisdom that comes as you age. I always believed that the interviewees in Tales of People Who Get It comprised my Board of Mentors. Since the publication of my book, I have interviewed another 10 people and they are the Invisible Mentors. I have an idea on how to integrate this new set of interviews into the revamped work, but I’d like some advice. Since the book was published, I have done more extensive analysis on the book, and I’d like t add that new information as well. And if there is a way to make it more useful, I’d like to know about it.

They have a saying, “When the student is ready the master appears,” and this was the case for me. I knew that I wanted to revamp my book, and I have already done a considerable amount of work on it, and I have written the concept paper for my membership site based on research that I have conducted. On November 16, 2010, I participated in a Tele-seminar hosted by Drew Gerber, CEO of PublicityResults.com and creator of PitchRate.com and led by John Eggen, Publishing and Marketing Mentor. The title of the seminar was intriguing, “Give me 75 minutes, and I’ll show you how to write a client-attracting book fast that makes up to $150,000 before it is published (and more thereafter),” but I must admit that I was far more intrigued by John Eggen’s biography.

John Eggen studied 5000 years of wisdom teaching at university, and one of the things that I’m striving for with The Invisible Mentor Blog, and in a deeper way with The Invisible Mentor Diamond Club is to marry modern and ancient wisdom and demonstrate modern day applications. The focus is on compressed knowledge for the busy executive. John has also worked with some very big names in the business, and the only way that I could consider working with him, and that he created a group coaching system which is far more affordable.

I had two phone meetings with John because he is in California and I am in Toronto, and I decided to sign up for his program. So what was it about John Eggen, that after two phone conversations I decided to try his group mentoring program? The answer is very simple, he is not in it for the money, and I connected with him on a deeper level. He clearly understood what I was trying to accomplish, and how I wanted to serve and contribute to humanity.

I had my group orientation session over the phone on January 5, 2011 It was a good session, but it’s going to be a lot of work, but does anything in life worth having ever comes easy? The program I am in is group mentoring and it runs for 12 months. There are lots of resources available to us, and I believe that I made the correct choice. I will let you know of my progress so that you too will learn from my experiences.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

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Your Invisible Mentor: Jacoline Loewen, Partner 

Company: Loewen & Partners

Website: http://www.loewenpartners.com

Many years ago, Jacoline Loewen went to see a psychic. The psychic heard her accent and assumed that she was from Australia, so she went on and on about Australia. None of her predictions were accurate. Jacoline wondered why she wasted her $50, which was a lot of money at the time. She asked herself, “What would make you breathless?” and developed a life plan of five-year increments for 25 years. Though her plans appeared bigger than life at the time, she has achieved all of them and more. Diane Danielson suggests that you go for the grande.

What makes you breathless? If you decided to go for the grande, what would that look like? While reading Part Two of Jacoline Loewen’s interview, think about what you can learn from her, and in what ways are you similar to her.

Avil Beckford: Tell me a little bit about yourself.

Jacoline Loewen: I work with Loewen & Partners which is a family business. I love to work but I also love to be a mother, I’m married as well, and I think I have done a pretty good job of combining all those things. I’ve tried to have it all and I would say because I am a high energy get-it-done person, you would think that I’m a corporate person, but my husband and children say that’s not the case.

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

Jacoline Loewen: I was very fortunate I had my father as my first mentor. I didn’t know that I was a “girl” because he took me to work with him all the time and loved discussing business with me. My mother was another mentor, she started her first business at age 53 and then ended up selling it 15 years later. She is my coach and I still phone her up, especially if I’ve had a really bad day, and she’ll get be back up on the horse. My father-in-law Chuck has been a tremendous mentor to me as well. He took me under his wing and showed me how he has done business so it gave me confidence to know how much success he’s had, how he has done it. I’m doing it the same way because in business you have to put so much out before you get the fruits of your reward for all you effort.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Jacoline Loewen: It’s the phoenix from the ashes. If you want to succeed you have to have tenacity, get punched in the face, and get up again. You have to get out into the fight, and finance is a very vicious place, it’s a very tough business. I’ve been in consulting and that’s a lot easier than finance. I would say that you have to keep going, and if you’re doing your own business you have to commit to it for 10 years. You are just not going to make it if you don’t realize that that’s the timeframe that you have to commit to.

Avil Beckford: Which books, training resources did your mentors refer to you?

Jacoline Loewen: It’s interesting because my father was very much into training courses, and he developed all the first safety training in mining and got me very involved in that. I learned action learning at that point, so not just reading a book. So if you read a book, share it and get up and make a speech about it. Give a 10-minute talk at your meeting. Obviously the book In Search of Excellence had a huge impact on me, and another book Intrapreneurship had an impact on me as well. These books were in the early eighties, then Rosabeth Moss Kanter had a book called The Change Agent which impacted me as well. My father-in-law, Chuck Loewen made me do an MBA, and I didn’t know what it was, and at the time I thought, “Why?” No one I knew had done it and I was in consulting at that point. I didn’t want to apply because I was afraid that I wouldn’t get in. I always had this mountain of not wanting to try things because I was too afraid.

Avil Beckford: As an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Jacoline Loewen: I spoke to this coach who coaches the top CEOs of the Top 10 companies listed on the stock exchange. I asked him, “What on earth can you teach these men? How do you mentor them?” and he said, “You have to know yourself.” And he told me about this book, As a Man Thinketh, that you can download from the internet, and I said, “Why? Obviously these guys know themselves.” And he said, “No, you have to make your personal life parallel with your work-life. Who you are at work is who you are at home.” Personal issues impact the way you are at work so he works a lot on their personal lives.

I would also tell your readers to listen to podcasts because they are so mobile and motivating, and they teach you so much. If you go on to iTunes Podcasts Higher Learning, all these universities offer courses. Stanford has entrepreneurs talking, you have the top guys from Google talking, and you can spend an hour listening to how these guys started their careers and their jobs and learn what happened to them.

Avil Beckford: How do you integrate your personal and professional life?

Jacoline Loewen: I’m lucky because I work in a family business so I can bring my sons into my office and they have worked for me. I pay them and they understand my work environment. I’ve always shared a lot with my sons even when they were tiny. I would talk to them about the fact that I was unhappy going to work because I wanted to spend time with them, and it was a big issue for me. I would share that with them and kids understand.

We socialize a lot with our clients now. My husband is what you call a “bear hugger,” and he bear hugs our clients and draws them into our social life. It’s actually great, we enjoy their company and we’ve become very good friends. I think the social aspect of having Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn is interesting because I have been wrestling with whethere or not I’m going to make my Facebook part of my business life. This is what people are moving toward. I’ve always hidden behind my brand, my name. I have this sexist attitude about how women will be valued and I’ve always used my initials for my books. I’m at the crossroads where I’ll probably open my Facebook and make it one with my Tweets and LinkedIn.

Avil Beckford: What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?

Jacoline Loewen: I tend to not step forward when I’m offered opportunities. People see me as a leader more than I see myself and then I don’t push for things enough. I’m nice, I’m a good girl.

For a major regret, I don’t know if I have any major regrets. I try to design what I’m doing so that I don’t have regrets. For example when I decided to stay home with my kids for a couple of years, I ended up doing my business anyway and I asked myself, “At 50 will you regret stepping off this corporate job.” I had an amazing corporate job that I had been at for five years, and to leave it was huge at the time. At 50 I would know that I made that decision on purpose. So I’m not sure that I have any regrets.

Avil Beckford: What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?

Jacoline Loewen: 

1. Things work out in the end so just keep going. I’ve had some terrible times in business, the one I talked about losing that client that I thought I was going to get. That was such a major financial commitment that I thought I had. Pick yourself up. Get on the horse, get on the phone calling, and get moving again as fast as you can. Astonishingly, within two weeks after we lost that client we got the best client we’ve ever had, and he is our number one client. But I had to force myself. I remember going out to see that client and feeling, “Oh what’s the point? This is a waste of time. It’s not going to happen,” and bang it happened.
2. Be yourself! I get so worried thinking that people will notice this, that or the other, or I didn’t do this and people will notice. People don’t care, and most people don’t notice a thing.
3. As an immigrant, get over it.
4. As a woman, get over it.
5. And the main thing I’ve learned is to relax and have more fun at work. I’ve always been so serious and tense. And I learned it’s okay to have fun. We took our clients out for World Cup Soccer to a local bar and had all these finance guys come out for it. I’m much more formal, but at these events, it’s where the real business happens.

Avil Beckford: When you have some down time, how do you spend it?

Jacoline Loewen: I like to paint. I like to read. I like to go to the movies and I like going out to dinner with my kids. I spend a lot of time talking with my children.

Avil Beckford: What process do you use to generate great ideas?

Jacoline Loewen: I read a lot of the best minds. I read Harvard Business Review and I ask people what books they are reading. The internet is amazing because of all the blogs you can read. I have a notebook at hand and I write all the time, and then I go back and look at what I’ve been writing and get my ideas from that. That’s how I write books.

Avil Beckford: What’s your favourite quotation and why?

Jacoline Loewen: “A few people in a room make the greatest changes in the world” by Margaret Meade. This quote shows you the power of strategy, the power of getting a few people together and making a big plan of what you’re going to do then getting everyone behind that plan and doing it.

Avil Beckford: How do you define success?

Jacoline Loewen: It’s what makes you happy. When I started my MBA, the first exercise we did was a values exercise. It was about what was important in your life. They did a whole week of that, getting you to understand yourself and your priorities. At the time I had a professor who was a Birkenstock kind of guy, he was into “Don’t be an A-type, relax.” I’m not a B-Type, I’m an A-Type. I’m someone who likes to be super busy all the time, that’s just how I am. So I define success not by how others define it.

Avil Beckford: In your opinion what’s the formula for success?

Jacoline Loewen: You really have to know your values. If you can sit down and write your Top Five values and keep those in mind, and plan your week keeping in mind those values. For example, I have my mother in town and my parents are seldom in the same city at the same time as I am. She is getting older so I make the time and carve it into my diary. Tuesday evenings she is at my home and I come home early from work and make dinner for the family. Even if someone comes to town like Russell Crowe for a date I would have to say no these are my values, these are my priorities.

Avil Beckford: What are the steps you took to succeed in your field?

Jacoline Loewen: You really have to plan it. When I was 25 I went to a psychic and I remember paying $50 which was a lot of money back then. She heard my accent and thought I was Australian, and she went on and on about Australia. I have never been to Australia and none of what she said was accurate and I wondered why I paid $50. I said to myself, “What would make you breathless?” and I planned 25 years of 5-year increments and it’s amazing how much of what I planned I achieved and went beyond. I still have that book. And yet at the time I thought there was no way I could achieve any of these things.

Avil Beckford: What advice do you have for someone just starting out in your field?

Jacoline Loewen: If you are starting out in private equity get a really good financial background. Get a CFA, Certified Financial Analyst certification, I recommend it. Work in a big company where you can get a high volume of deals. Go to New York or London, England if you can.

Avil Beckford: If trusted friends could introduce you to five people that you’ve always wanted to meet, who would you choose? And what would you say to them?

Jacoline Loewen: 

1. Don Tapscott: I love his business ability, his ability to market his books and he is obviously a kind person as well. I would say to him, “Don could you spend an hour with me and show me how I can take my books, and where I am right now, and leverage them the way you have?”
2. Margaret Thatcher: She came into power at the time when many people were emigrating from the UK. There were rolling blackouts, the unions had all the power in Britain, there were no jobs, and she changed all of that. I would like to spend an hour with her and find out how she managed her fear. She was from an entrepreneurial background, her father was in the grocery business.
3. Queen Elizabeth I: I would ask her why she didn’t marry Walter Raleigh
4. William Shakespeare: I love to write and I would ask him if he really wrote all those plays, how did he write and when and where he would write and what inspired him.
5. Kathryn Bigelow: She directed The Hurt Locker and was the first women to win the Academy Award for Best Director. I’d love her to spend an hour with me talking about her career in the movie business.

The Hurt Locker – Official Trailer [HD]

If you cannot view the YouTube video please click here.

Avil Beckford: Which one book had a profound impact on your life? What was it about this book that impacted you so deeply?

Jacoline Loewen: That would definitely be In Search of Excellence: Lessons from America’s Best-Run Companies by Tom Peters.

Avil Beckford: If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are five books that you would like to have with you and why? Summarize the book in two sentences.

Jacoline Loewen: If I’m on a deserted island I’d have a lot to read. I would definitely go for volume.

• I’d have the Bible not that I’m religious but because I have never read the whole thing and it’s dense so it would take a lot of time to read it
• The entire set of Encyclopedia Britannica
• Get some Booker Prize novels that I haven’t read – The Gathering is something that I’ve wanted to read
• Anything by Gary Hamel who I love
• And of course Michael Porter’s Competitive Advantage: Creating and Sustaining Superior Performance, Competitive Strategy: Techniques for Analyzing Industries and Competitors

Avil Beckford: What one music CD and movie would you like to have with you (on the deserted island) and why?

Jacoline Loewen: I would have Diana Ross’ Greatest Hits. I just love her, her songs have a profound sadness to them but she is always getting over her sadness. She is always making bold statements and going for what she wants. She always energizes me. The movie would have to be Gladiator. I love his energy and bravery.

Diana Ross- Do You Know Where You’re Going To – Live 2011

If you cannot view this YouTube video please click here.

Gladiator Trailer HD

If you cannot view this YouTube video please click here.

Avil Beckford: Have you read any books which inspired you to start a business or introduce a service?

Jacoline Loewen: Actually yes. You know who is great, believe it or not, is Martha Stewart. She wrote a book, The Martha Rules when she was in prison, that’s a great book and if you are in business, that’s a really great book to read and get ideas from.

Avil Beckford: What excites you about life?

Jacoline Loewen: My family excites me about life: my sons, husband and mother. My father has passed away now.

Avil Beckford: How do you nurture your soul?

Jacoline Loewen: Spending time with my family.

Avil Beckford: If you had a personal genie and she gave you one wish, what would you wish for? Or, if I gave you a magic wand, what would you use it for?

Jacoline Loewen: Besides money, fame, power, beauty (she laughs) or the ability to eat chocolate as much as I wanted, I would wish for – going beyond my family – to have my family business become a legacy business. In other words, I would love to grow my business to pass it on to another generation of business owners.

Avil Beckford: Complete the following, I am happy when…..

Jacoline Loewen: I am happy when I am motivating and exciting others.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Book links are affiliate links.

Video Credits: The Hurt Locker – Official Trailer [HD] Uploaded by trailers on Jun 12, 2009; Diana Ross- Do You Know Where You’re Going To – Live 2011 Uploaded by goldmosh on Sep 22, 2011; Gladiator Trailer HD Uploaded by FilmTrailersChannel on Aug 22, 2009

Related articles

• Jacoline Loewen on the three steps to create value (moneymagnetbook.blogspot.com)
• Should I hire a broker or investment banker to help me sell my company? (moneymagnetbook.blogspot.com)
• Jacoline Loewen on 3 Rules for every Start Up – BNN The Pitch (moneymagnetbook.blogspot.com)