The Invisible Mentor

Posts Tagged ‘Mentor’

One of the best ways to attain professional success is to study what other accomplished people have done, and adapt the parts of their success plan that make sense for our unique situation. The Invisible Mentor interviews are very in-depth, and the reader may miss important pieces of information because there is simply so much content. So for today and tomorrow, I will extract excerpts from recent interviews and align the responses of a few interviewees to the same questions. I will focus on the mentoring and career related questions.

Today we are featuring:

Paulette Ensign, TipsBooklet.com

John Klotz, President, Northwood Mortgage Life Insurance Corporation

Mary Schnack, Mary Schnack & Associates

Sarah Speake, Strategic Marketing Director, Google UK

Andrew Warner, Mixergy.com

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

Paulette Ensign: Mostly in good ways. The president of the music college that I attended for my undergraduate work said, “You go to a concert for two reasons: to find out what you like and to find out what you don’t like.” My mentors helped with that regardless of what profession I was in. And I had mentors in each of my three careers. They helped me to see what I liked that I wanted to emulate, expand and expound on, and they helped me see and sift through the things that really were not a match for me.

My mentors helped me to see who I am, respect it and build on it. For instance, they taught me to honour what my gift, personality and approach was all about. I am a go-getter kind of a person and for me to be a soft spoken person, is not the primary nature of who I am.

John Klotz: I’ve always had mentors. One of the mentors I have now is my partner Art Appleberg, who has basically taken Northwood Mortgage the brokerage he started 20 years ago and grew it into a 200 person sales force. We’ve set up a model on the insurance side that is similar to but not identical to the mortgage brokerage business. But I’m trying to follow – Art is full of all this wisdom – how to build a brokerage. He has done it on the brokerage side and I’m doing it on the insurance and investment side. He is a great mentor so it’s always good to go in and tell him what’s working and what’s not. The thing about mentors is that it’s not all about glory. You also have to talk about what’s not working. That’s been really great for me.

I’ve had other mentors along the way. At my last employment the owner and I were very tight and I always talked to him about how I would do things. Mentors have always helped me.

Mary Schnack: Mentors influenced my life and continue to influence my life. I have two or three probably more different mentors that I work with all the time, and thank goodness I have those sounding boards, the people giving me advice. I would say they’ve had a great influence both in living my life personally and businesswise.

Sarah Speake: Posing good questions first and foremost so that I challenged myself. And that’s also for formal mentors in the business community that I’ve had. Equally I have a close set of girlfriends, many of whom I have known for over 20 years, and in a less formal sense I see them as my mentors too. The two give me very different sets of advice in a way because they know me in a different context, but they definitely influence my life in a very positive way and allowed me to challenge myself by posing questions that I would probably be a bit reticent to ask of myself without a bit of prodding.

Andrew Warner: I didn’t have enough of them unfortunately and I wish that I had more along the way. I know that there were times when I couldn’t see that having four or five big clients was dangerous for my business. I had them, I was doing well, I turned away other customers because I couldn’t fit them all in. That was a big mistake, then a few of them went out of business, and if three of them went out of business, 60 percent of my revenue was shot.

If I had a mentor, he would have looked at it and said, “Look Andrew, I know you are doing well but you’d be better off with less money but securing your future by locking in multiple sponsors,” or they would have said, “Andrew, you should diversify away from this business and have other product lines,” and I just didn’t have that. That was a big mistake.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Paulette Ensign: The old Nike slogan to “Just Do It.” The core message is that I do not need approval from other people to do and be who I am, and that who I am really is something that needs to be shared with people who are open to receiving that. I am not everybody’s cup of tea, and that’s the good news.

John Klotz: Never say die, constantly improve, and that whole kaizen that the Japanese constantly look for better ways to do things. Always keep your eyes open, always act professionally like I told you about that “Good Loser” letter. That’s professional, if a client says, “I don’t want you as my adviser,” instead of being snotty, respond with a “Good Loser” letter. I never send angry emails, ever. I’ve received them, but I never send them because that’s on record forever.

Mary Schnack: I continue to receive messages from them. One of the first messages I received was to continue to learn, to continue to expand. With something like social media, you think, “I’m too old for that, I don’t want to deal with that.” We have to continue to learn, and continue to be educated, and grow as people, and grow as businesses, and it’s also a lot of fun.

Sarah Speake: Be authentic and don’t be afraid to make mistakes. I’m naturally a perfectionist and a bit of a control freak if I’m being brutally honest, and I think the advice around not being scared to make mistakes allowed one to learn more than constantly thinking that I have to do everything perfectly and 200 percent. I think I’ve actually learned as much from my mistakes as my accomplishments.

Andrew Warner: I still have to say that I do not have them. The closest I could get to a mentor was when I went to my old college professor and I asked him for advice, and I don’t even remember getting it. And the problem was I didn’t make it formal. He didn’t have anything to give me at that point, I didn’t come back to him in the future because there wasn’t an agreement to do so and that was it.

Avil Beckford: An Invisible Mentor is a unique leader you can learn things from by observing them from a distance, in the capacity of an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Paulette Ensign: One of the things that have been very consistently voiced over the year that I have been involved with Tips Booklets specifically is the concern of people already knowing what the booklet author is thinking about putting in the booklet, or the question, “Gee, doesn’t everyone know this already and why should I bother to do this?” And I see and hear this so often that I continue to encourage people to think in terms of the fact that each of us has lived with, breathed with and slept with our own expertise, so we know it very differently than people who are coming to us for the first time. So that the folks who are coming to us, whether invisible, or visible, interactive or passive.

Think in terms of the fact that some people know some of what you know, some know a lot of what you know, and some don’t know any of what you know. It is really valuable to put your knowledge out there because if they don’t know anything at all about your expertise, that’s great; if they know some of what you know, you can definitely function as a good reminder to them and if they know a lot of what you know, confirmation is certainly valuable to people so do yours anyway. That’s what I think can be of great value to readers about what they can do to move forward in only the best way.

John Klotz: There are different readers, so let’s say I’m thinking about someone who is going into a career. One of the things that I did is that I wrote down a list of the things that I wanted in a career. And I knew when I entered this business that I wanted something with an education path; that was important to me. And I knew that I wanted something where there was no limit to your upside potential. And I knew that I wanted something where I could grow old with my clients so it wasn’t always a new sale every week it was about building relationships. And I didn’t want things like territories, but I wanted to be able to move all over the place. And I wanted something with real scope.

I wrote that 20 years ago, I created that list, I wanted an education path, I wanted a career with no limit on the ceiling, I wanted open territories and I wanted the opportunity to be a professional, to really embrace something. So what I would say to people listening to this is if you are looking at some sort of career, whatever, I would say know what you want because if you know what you want you will pursue it.

One of the failures I had is a job that didn’t work out, they let me go. I was selling office equipment and I didn’t enjoy it. So 20 years ago, I wrote down what I wanted in a new career, so I would say know what you want, write it down and set a plan.

Mary Schnack: My one piece of advice is to really look at your successes and let people know what they are, and that doesn’t mean sitting back and bragging about yourself. But it does mean sharing your wisdom, and having people understand why you are sharing that wisdom because you have that experience. When I do my speeches overseas, we also hear this in the United States, but when I do my speeches overseas even more so, “My culture doesn’t allow that, I could never do that.” And my response is “By you sharing your successes there might be a 10-year old girl out there that hears your story and says, ‘Wow, I can go after my dreams.’” And what a shame it is if you miss the chance to inspire that 10-year old girl.

Sarah Speake: I’m a huge believer in self-assessment, to constantly strive to better one’s self. I’ve just talked about the idea of being authentic, which is a piece of advice that I have been given on a number of occasions by mentors in the past. I think self-assessment is very difficult to do regularly but I think that by holding the mirror up to one’s self and truly looking at what am I good at, what am I not so good at, does it actually matter if I have a few weaknesses? Probably not, but keeping check of the direction that you are going in and going through that process is really important. And it’s something that I do on a regular basis to keep myself on track, equally, asking people for feedback. I think it’s very difficult to be authentic unless you genuinely understand how you’re viewed by others, and that includes the positive and the negative. So taking feedback and not necessarily seeing it as a personal slight, it’s actually taking it on board and working on it by going through the process of looking through the mirror.

Andrew Warner: Be willing to fail. The biggest ideas we have we were often not willing to act on because we weren’t willing to fail. When I started doing video interviews I almost didn’t do them because I said, “What if people see me online in video and they laugh at me and think I’m ridiculous or funny looking on camera. Or who is this guy, he wants to be some kind of Hollywood guy so he is starting to do videos?”

But I just kept at it, I fight that fight despite what would happen if I failed in public and I’m so glad that I did because through interviews I have gotten to know over 400 successful entrepreneurs. I see hundreds of thousands of people every month who are influenced by the work I do and I’m seeing more and more entrepreneurs build businesses because of the work I do so I’m so glad I didn’t stop because of that. And I would say the same thing to everyone who is paying attention to the interview, just be willing to fail.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Image Credit: Avil Beckford

Over centuries, mentors have been playing a significant role in the lives of successful people. Mentor first appeared in Homer’s Odyssey where he was left in charge of Telemachus, the young son of King Odysseus who went to fight in the Trojan War. The Goddess Athena disguised as Mentor advised Telemachus when he grew older, to go and search for his father who had now been gone for 20 years.

Image via Wikipedia

In more recent times, Freddie Laker mentored Sir Richard Branson, Roger Corman mentored Martin Scorcese and Ron Howard, and former Xerox CEO Anne M. Mulcahy mentored Ursula Burns to take over the reins.

Since Mentor first appeared, the mentoring role has evolved into what it is today. According to Dictionary.com, a mentor is a “Wise and trusted counselor or teacher, an influential senior sponsor or supporter.”

But mentors can be invisible.

That means that the mentor does not know that they are mentoring us. These invisible mentors are our role models. We choose them because we want to study their behaviours. We want to learn from them so we can possibly mimic their actions. Often they have done something that we would like to do, or are trying to do but with some difficulty.

Mentors who are invisible to their mentees have been around for a while.

The concept of the invisible mentor is not new. Napoleon Hill talks about them in his timeless classic Think and Grow which was first published in 1937, but he calls them “invisible counselors”.

According to Hill, “I followed the habit of reshaping my own character by trying to imitate the nine men whose lives and life works had been most impressive to me… Ralph Waldo Emerson, Thomas Paine, Thomas Edison, Charles Darwin, Abraham Lincoln, Luther Burbank, Napoleon Bonaparte, Henry Ford and Andrew Carnegie… I studied the records of their lives with painstaking care.”

He not only studied the lives of his nine invisible mentors, but he blended the information he learned with his knowledge, and he acted on the information by imaging their good qualities. This investment in time spent getting to know these nine men benefitted him tremendously because he knew them so well that he could anticipate how they would respond in various situations – and he responded that way.

More recently, in 2000, Washington State University professor Karen L. Peterson in her paper “Invisible Mentor: Communication Theory and Lilian Katz” wrote about invisible mentors and described the mentee as an absorbent learner. “Invisible mentors are not “super-human” persuaders or orators, nor are they icons with intractable wisdom. An invisible mentor has the capacity and capability (albeit a gift) to see just above the “tree top” and the ability and commitment to come “back down” and tell many below what can be seen… The invisible mentor has the instinctive capability to sort out the valuable from the superfluous,” said Peterson.

Invisible mentors are still relevant today.

After researching the idea of “invisible mentors,” I concluded that they are unique leaders you can learn things from, by observing them from a distance. It is not enough to have one traditional mentor, because no one person can fill all the roles we need them to. But invisible mentors can complement our traditional mentor. Napoleon Hill had his personal Board of Invisible Counselors. And we can have the same.

It is easier for us than it was for Napoleon Hill because of the unprecedented access we have to information. Today, most of us have access to the Internet, which opens us up to online databases, videos, podcasts, e-books, free courses, you name it. At the click of a mouse, we can learn about almost anyone, we can find and study our own invisible mentors.

And with social networks such as Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter, it easier to contact people who once appeared untouchable and unreachable to us. In addition, Skype allows us to talk to people in other countries without long distance charges that can be prohibitive.

Invisible mentors are relevant today because if we choose our invisible mentors carefully, they can help to accelerate our success trajectory, but we have to be willing to invest the time like Napoleon Hill did to research those who have travelled the path we are embarking on. Or who have done, or are doing what we most want to do. And most importantly, we have to blend that newfound knowledge with what we already know.

So, what’s next?

• What are you are trying to accomplish in life?
• Who are five people who have done what you are trying to do?
• Have they written books or developed videos and other material that explains what they did and how they did it?
• If the five people who you chose are still alive, would they be willing to speak to you for 15 minutes?
• What skills do you lack that are critical to your success?
• Who possess those skills set that you can study them?

These questions are not exhaustive, they are meant to get you thinking. Do you see the relevance of invisible mentors? You could research Napoleon Hill’s nine “invisible counselors”, or you could look at some of the interviews on this blog to get ideas. Many of the people who interviewees choose who they would most like to meet would make incredible invisible mentors as well.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Related articles

• Adventures in Learning: DIY Mentoring Program (theinvisiblementor.com)
• 2011 Interviews for Mentoring (theinvisiblementor.com)
• Adventures in Learning: DIY Mentoring Program, Episode Three (theinvisiblementor.com)
• Create Your Board of Mentors – January is National Mentoring Month (theinvisiblementor.com)

Interviewee Name: Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia, Founder

Company Name: NORSUN Diversity and Cross-Culture Consulting

Website: http://diversity-and-cross-culture.com/

Avil Beckford: Tell me a little bit about yourself.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I am Norwegian, I have lived in Switzerland, Cyprus and the US, now I’m living in France. I am a consultant, trainer and coach – and also mentor on a voluntary basis for the European Professional Women’s Network (EPWN). And I recently started up my company NORSUN Diversity and Cross-Culture Consulting.

Avil Beckford: What’s a typical day like for you?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Not sure I have a typical day yet, as my company is still in the making. But the day always include morning, afternoon and evening walks with my Golden Retriever. The last few months I have been working on three trainings, and recently I have been busy setting up a blog and using Twitter.

Avil Beckford: How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It is rather easy, as my work is something I feel passionately for. Otherwise it is important for me to keep a balance between work and leisure, and this balance keeps me motivated.

Avil Beckford: If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Concerning my business, I would have contacted more large consulting companies to freelance at an earlier stage. The financial market is still tough in the consulting business and if I had more freelancing contacts I think that would have been better.

Avil Beckford: What’s the most important business or other discovery you’ve made in the past year?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It has been a pleasure to discover that the consulting business is very supportive. I had expected fierce competition, whereas what I find is that my “competitors” if you like are very willing to share information and be supportive

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I would say that it’s E-learning, blended learning, more structure – and demand for certification – around what it means to be a coach and mentor

Avil Beckford: When you say blended learning, what do you msn by that?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I mean training that has many different elements so that could mean an e-learning element within the blended learning. It could be that you have to do exercises, or group training combined with more traditional face-to-face training.

Avil Beckford: What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia:

1. The financial market and competition.
   1. It is all about networking and creating trust so that customers choose me despite the above.
2. Gender discussion “fatigue”. By that I mean I have noticed that some people feel tired of the subject “women on boards, leadership.” I think that communication that focuses on a better future for men and women in business and at home is the way to go forward.

Avil Beckford: What’s unique about the service that you provide?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: To do that I have to go back a little. It is proven that a diverse company with an inclusive environment produces better bottom line results. I help businesses increase organisational performance through focus on inclusion, a diverse workforce and a better understanding of working across national cultures.

As a consultant, coach, mentor and trainer, my strength lies in my combination of strategic and operational experience, as well as having worked internationally cross-border and living in different countries. I am a good listener and have a solution-minded attitude.

Avil Beckford: What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I don’t like to focus on what others do badly. But I see a danger in cross-cultural trainers getting too hung up on the theories of intercultural specialists like Trompenaars and Hofstede. Their tools are helpful, as long as one does not forget about individual differences and taking the time to get to know people.

Avil Beckford: Describe a major business or other challenge you had and how you resolved it.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It was actually to get all the paper work done to set up my business. With my cultural background (Norwegian) it is not natural for me to chase people, it is considered rude in my culture. But here in France it is more common to chase people to get things done. I learnt it by doing, and I got it done, but it was hard for me.

Avil Beckford: What lessons did you learn in the process?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Listen to the people who have “inside information” and follow their advice, even if it is difficult to do.

Avil Beckford: Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: It wasn’t a big break, but I would like to mention the story. In high school I had a gym teacher that had the ability to “see” people. One time I was going through a difficult time, she saw it without me having to say a word. She asked me if I wanted to talk and I said yes. It was a relief to talk with an adult that showed so much understanding. It is something I have carried with me, the importance of “seeing” people and reaching out a hand. Sometimes I fail, but I try the best I can.

Avil Beckford: Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: One time I did not work well with a superior. I learnt that there may be greater cultural differences than one would expect between neighbouring countries. It forced me to flex my style, it wasn’t comfortable, but it gave better results.

Avil Beckford: What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I rather tend to have many small disappointments, and they come in squadrons, as they say in French. When these periods arrive, I focus on “what happened instead?” “What positive outcome has there been from this disappointment?”

Avil Beckford: What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Well, I think the toughest decisions in life are most likely to be very personal ones. One that I can share was the decision to settle in France with my French husband. I knew that it would be a long process to integrate, as I had to learn the language (which isn’t easy!) and get used to yet another culture. The result is that I have indeed learnt the language, although it took longer than I liked, and I live in a very beautiful country with a wonderful climate – and we live a blessed life.

Avil Beckford: What are three events that helped to shape your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia:

1. The fact that I decided to take an education abroad set the scene for my intercultural experience. I had traveled over longer periods of time before that, but actually spending years abroad gives a stronger impact.
2. My husband. He provides a balance to my life that is amazing.
3. It is rather a personality trait than an event, but it does shape my life; I tend to take calculated risks (e.g. quitting my job before having another one, starting my own business). These risks have brought me exciting challenges (e.g. international job in a large petroleum company).

Avil Beckford: What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I am very proud of a blended learning on working across cultures that I produced (main designer and team leader) in 2009 for a large petroleum company.

Avil Beckford: How did mentors influence your life?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: I have had many invisible mentors, and some formal ones. They help me to trigger off new ideas or push me to get done things I already have in mind.

Avil Beckford: What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: That they believe in me

Avil Beckford: As an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Sunniva Heggertveit Aoudia: Follow your interests and don’t give up.

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

This is a guest post by Rodger Harding a business coach and artist. He also manages the mentorship program for the Canadian Women in Communication (CWC).

Mentoring is today a much used word in the workplace, and appears to be a concept that means different things to different people.

My own official introduction to mentorship was back in the late eighties when the New South Africa finally came into being. It was a heady time. Madiba was released after 27 years of imprisonment, the ANC, the Communist Party, the Pan African Congress etc were un-banned and exiles were returning to their country of birth en masse.

Preparing new diplomats, literally overnight, to represent this almost unbelievable transition period was daunting. Officials were rushed through qualifying courses and posted aboard to new diplomatic missions with little experience. More seasoned colleagues had the task of mentoring them on the job in the art of diplomacy and protocol.

The experience taught me a never to be forgotten lesson that today underpins my ongoing passion for mentoring:

Best mentorship results are achieved by recognizing, understanding and reflecting back who a Mentee really is… and then marrying the ability of the now confident individual to organizational goals.

This task requires a conscious detachment on the part of the Mentor as to Mentee outcomes. Mentorship, as opposed to coaching/training, is decidedly more about enabling rather than changing people!

How can you use this information? What do you have to add to the conversation? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right hand side) by email or RSS Feed.

Interviewee Name: David Gray

Company Name: DSG Associates

Website: http://www.davidgraycoach.com

Avil Beckford:  How do you integrate your personal and professional life?

David Gray: My personal and professional life are seamless in the sense that I work almost every day and I set my own hours, so one blends into the other in that respect.  On the other hand, I make a very clear distinction between clients and friends.  Sometimes one becomes the other and vice versa, but for the most part my private life is just that.

Avil Beckford:  What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?

David Gray: I regret not having traveled the world when I was in my twenties instead of jumping right into a career.

Avil Beckford:  What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?

David Gray:

1. Treat everyone as a friend unless or until they give you reason not to do so
2. Seek to understand and only then to be understood
3. Be completely trustworthy, as trust is the foundation for all true relationships
4. Be true to yourself
5. Treat everyone with dignity and respect, but be especially gentle with the old, the young, the weak and the less fortunate

Avil Beckford:  When you have some down time, how do you spend it?

David Gray: I spend my “down-time” in one of four ways:  thinking/reflecting on my own; working out physically at the gym or at home; reading; with close friends, usually one-to-one.

Avil Beckford:  What process do you use to generate great ideas?

David Gray: Take the situation, consider the conventional wisdom and then try to turn it on its head and see what comes up.  In other words, think in a consciously contrarian style.

Avil Beckford:  How do you define success?

David Gray: Success as I define it is an intensely personal and individual reality.  For me personally, success fundamentally consists in being true to my own ideals and life philosophy while engaging in a genuine way with clients and friends such that they feel enriched for having spent time with me.

Avil Beckford:  In your opinion what’s the formula for success?

David Gray: The formula for success is simple:  Chase your dreams, not other people’s ideas of success.

Avil Beckford:  What does it take to succeed in your field?

David Gray: To be successful in my field one typically needs empathy, compassion, a conscientious work ethic and a background in HR.  However, to be truly outstanding one additionally needs a great degree of life history in a variety of business settings as well as a high degree of intuitive and innovative intelligence in order to be able to work with people from numerous diverse backgrounds who are each struggling with very individual career and life challenges.  In a word, one needs wisdom.  And typically, that can only be accumulated over a long period of time after encountering a variety of challenging situations in one’s own career and life.

Avil Beckford:  Which one book had a profound impact on your life?

David Gray: Hero of a Thousand Faces by the great mythologist, Joseph Campbell.  He taught me to ‘follow my bliss.’

Avil Beckford:  If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are five books that you would like to have with you and why? Give a brief summary of each book.

David Gray:

• Don Quixote, by Miguel De Cervantes:  The first modern novel, this book revolutionized the imaginative approach to the then core myth of Chivalry, itself a central concept in most European’s self-construct.  This book reminds us never to take at face value the assumptions of the society in which we happen to live because of vagaries of our birth in a particular geographical space, social context and time.
• The Shield of Achilles: War, Peace and the Course of History, by Philip Bobbitt.  An erudite and sweeping review of European history until the 19th century and then an analysis of world history in the 20th and early 21st centuries viewed from the dual perspectives of Law and War.  This book provides a context within which to grasp the complex geopolitics of the world we currently live in.
• The Poetry of Robert Frost: All eleven of his books – complete, edited by Edward Connery Lathem.  This book reminds one that the only life worth living is one including a degree of reflection.
• The Measure of a Man: a Spiritual Autobiography - Sidney Poitier.  This book teaches a man how to live as a man.  In a day and age when men are increasingly out of touch with their essential masculinity, Poitier’s story of his personal challenges, triumphs and philosophy of life reads like a melodic breath of very fresh air.
• Lincoln’s Melancholy:  How Depression Challenged a President and Fuelled His Greatness, by Joshua Wolf Shenk.  A biography that reads like a detective novel. The real Lincoln is far more fascinating and inspiring than the manufactured American myth of the man.  Like Poitier’s book, this one provides insights into what is possible to achieve and, far more importantly, what it means to live life as a man who is true to his own vision, come hell or high water.  Interestingly, in Lincoln’s case it was the hellfire of a bullet, whereas for Poitier it was a near-death experience with high water.

Avil Beckford:  If you had a personal genie and she gave you one wish, what would you wish for? Or, if I gave you a magic wand, what would you use it for?

David Gray: If I could have one wish granted, it would be to have all of my future wishes granted on a reversible (if unintended consequences ensued) basis.  But seriously…it would be to see President Obama lead the world, by astute understanding and management of long-range American foreign affairs interests, out of the political and economic bankruptcy created by the current American Administration and into a new era of relative peace and stability.

Avil Beckford:  Complete the following, I am happy when…..

David Gray: I am happ(iest) when surrounded by a few very close friends, discussing world affairs, telling jokes, enjoying the warmth of each other’s company and generally having a good laugh while stretching our minds.

About David Gray

David has advised executive clients based in Canada, the UK, Europe and Asia. In addition to his own consulting practice, David serves as President of the Board, Toronto Chapter of the Association of Career Professionals International (ACP International), and is a member of the Strategic Leadership Forum (GTA).

Prior to working as a career and strategic leadership consultant, David held management positions in Canada and the UK in business & technology consulting, and started up and managed two Divisions in Canada for a blue chip, global financial services organization.

David’s quiet, incisive, highly personalized approach has inspired many executives and entrepreneurs who are in process of redefining strategic paradigms to realize growth opportunities on both a business and personal level.

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