The Invisible Mentor

Archive for March, 2010

This week I present Carolyn Barber and as usual the interview will be in two parts. I have known Carolyn for about 13 years, but I learned things that I didn’t know about her while interviewing her. Think back to a time when you made a drastic change in your life, what happened to trigger that change?

Can you imagine being on a flight and told that there is a possibility that the plane will crash because the landing gear isn’t functioning? Carolyn was on such a flight, and nearly the entire flight, the passengers were going through crash landing drills. Some passengers felt they had lived a good life so dying would be okay, others were terrified and crying. Carolyn didn’t think they were going to die, but it made her think  about her life, and she realized that she would have to make drastic changes.

She was given a second chance, and she decided that she didn’t like her job, so she made a plan, and a year later she took early retirement , retrained and started a new career which she is still doing. Using Carolyn as an example, it’s never too late to try new things.

Carolyn talks about mentoring in the video below. I am experimenting and it’s a bit dark but you can hear what she says.

Interview With Carolyn Barber from Avil Beckford on Vimeo.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.

I am a 70-year old, single woman living in Riverdale, Toronto. I have a part-time business in nutritional counseling that I started when I was 62 after retiring early as a nutritionist in public health. My career is a fairly important to me and it takes up a couple of days of my life. I am quite involved with my church and it’s a big part of my life and friendships. And perhaps the main reason for me being at the church is the community that it offers to me aside from the spiritual aspect which would be secondary for me. My family of three kids and four grandchildren are also really important to me. I am also a very active person. My favourite outdoor activities are camping and canoeing together. I also like biking and hiking, and for indoors, my passion is cooking. I am quite interested in the art scene in Toronto: opera, theatre, and music of various sorts such as the Toronto Consort. I keep quite busy.

What’s a typical day like for you?

I do not have many typical days, I try to keep Mondays and Tuesdays for my business so I am often up around 7:00, 7:30 am. I use an auto share car to get to a Mississauga rehab clinic where I do nutritional counseling. After that I see private clients in my home. In the evenings I am often on the phone inviting friends to come over for dinner.

How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

I think that a lot of my motivation comes from being active, keeping fit, going to the gym frequently, hiking and biking. I seem to naturally feel motivated in all aspects of my life, and my family and social life helps me to stay on track and the motivation just is there for me. It isn’t so often a problem.

If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

I would have paid more attention to my unique interests in my work and even in my home life. I would have looked at the things that I like to do and treasure, honor and explore them more. I think your passions lead you deeper into activities.

What’s the most important business or other discovery you’ve made in the past year?

Working with my clients I get very excited about nutrition, and I was amazed that I still maintain my passion for nutrition. Many times when I woke up in the mornings I thought for sure that my passion was gone, that I was no longer keen, but when I start talking to a client I have that interest again and I’m finding that stays with me which is a surprise and like a discovery.

What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

There is a lot of new research into holistic, alternative, complementary nutrition. It’s finding its way into the mainstream and that’s affecting my business, it’s improving my business.

What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

1. Age is a threat to how I handle my business and what I’d do in my business. I already see that my interests and passions change and my energy changes so I have to change with that. Age very much affects my life at this point in terms of what I would do in the later stage of my career.
2. How much money I have is another threat. Lack of money drove me into a career when most people would have stopped, and because I still need to look for money I have to find creative ways to get it. A lack of money has actually been a bonus to me because it helped me to move ahead.

What’s unique about the service that you provide?

I am a registered dietitian but I have training in complementary nutrition. There are very few dieticians in Toronto who have that training.

What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

I think that dietitians are not paying enough attention to the alternative stream, the complementary stream of nutrition, and I think that they are missing the boat because that’s where the clientele is going. I wouldn’t say they are doing something badly, but they are not using their full skills and they are not benefiting the clients as much as they could. I feel that I have an edge there.

Describe a major business or other challenge you had and how you resolved it.

When I retired early from Public Health I had no form of income and I had to find something,  and how I resolved it was by really writing and reading books which I will talk about later. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron is a book that I’d recommend because it helps you to see who you are, honor who you are, and you get to see your entire self, your longings. Out of that process I got a notebook and wrote down the things that I wanted to explore, and I kept making lists and checking them off and forcing myself to do one thing every day and keep working away until a path emerged.

What lessons did you learn in the process?

1. Pay attention to the things that interests you, that excites you
2. Build on your strengths instead of thinking I’ll start a completely different career because the other one didn’t completely meet my needs
3. Plug away

Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

I didn’t necessarily have one big break. Changing my career to me was a break and I’ve talked about that. But a recent break that I had was when I started working in the insurance field doing independent examination for nutrition claims, and that really happened through a chance piece of work that I got, and me researching what other opportunities were in that field.

Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

I would say that as a manager at Public Health, I didn’t feel that I excelled at being a manager.  I am not a very social person though I am great at one-to-one interactions. I got out of that because I thought that wasn’t my niche. And I ended up doing something that I like much better.

What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

Not having a male partner in my life has been my biggest disappointment. It’s something that I think about every day. I keep working at meeting people. My husband died when I was 35 and I have not really had any long-term relationships since then except for a four-year relationship.

What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

I have never found any decision that was so difficult to make. They seem to just come to me. It’s quite natural for me to make decisions and I cannot think of any decisions that I really had to agonize over, but one would probably be to stop my work in public health. That happened when I was on a flight back from Newfoundland and there was danger that the flight was going to crash, luckily we landed up okay. But during that time I had some very difficult emotional times and I felt that I wasn’t getting everything that I needed out of my life and I had to make changes.

I started to think this isn’t the end of my life, I am not happy, and I had to change. So the next year I set my plan into motion and left Public Health.

What are three events that helped to shape your life?

1. The plane I was on nearly crashed
2. My husband died when we were both young, in our thirties. He was a dominant person so I had to really learn to handle everything after his death, which I had previously unlearned
3. I grew up on a farm, which influenced my life in that I always saw myself as a working class person, and from that background I never saw myself as an elite and I was never comfortable in that environment. The way I was brought up was to be a good person, and it wasn’t about being the best you could be or be a success. So I was never taught that, “you must do your very best, I know that you are going to be something great.”  Sometimes when I have thought that I am doing really well here, I would often tone myself down and think “don’t think you are so smart.” I think that aspect of my upbringing has been a detriment to me at certain times, and a conflict

What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

Starting my business and going back to school at age 61

How did mentors influence your life?

I do not have a sense of many mentors in my life. I feel as if I have done a lot of things on my own. Obviously in talking to friends, I must have used them as sounding boards, but I was mostly on my own. In my recent years, there have been certain nutrition people who I look up to, and take the courses that they offer. Aileen Burford-Mason, a nutritionist is someone who I consider to be a mentor.

What are five takeaways from Carolyn’s interview?

Please keep the conversation flowing, click on the comment link below and leave a note for me. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

For your research and writing needs, consider my firm Ambeck Enterprise for white papers, articles, fact sheets, anniversary booklets, you name it. Since I am the best kept secret you may not know this, but I have over 15 years research and writing experience. I KNOW content. And if you cannot figure out which books to read for professional development, I am your WOMAN. I can assist you with that too. Visit my sales page for resources such as The Invisible Mentor Toolkit to assist you in acquiring wisdom from a distance. For free white papers click here.

Since last week I have been including tools to assist you with your professional development. The Reading & Listening Plan Process has been taken from The Invisible Mentor Toolkit, which is packed with a lot of tools and processes to enhance continuous learning. The Toolkit is also designed to walk you through the process of choosing your five invisible mentors.

1. Invest in a good speed-reading course
2. To get tips on how to get the most out of your reading, read
   1. How to Read A Book
   2. Book-Lover
   3. The Reading of Books
      
   4. How to Read and Why
      
   5. The Art of Thought, (The Thinker’s library)
      
   6. The Thinker’s Guides (Center for Critical Thinking)
3. Set a daily reading goal and schedule it into your day
   1. Try to read about 40 to 50 pages a day, which will allow you to read about a book each week
   2. Get up earlier and/or stay up later if necessary
   3. If your aim is to attain mastery in a topic within three years you have to apply the necessary discipline
4. What to read each month
   1. Choose another two from the list of books that influenced people profiled in Tales of People Who Get It and the CEOs featured in the New York Times article
   2. Have a combination of fiction and non-fiction and every now and again read a children’s book “just because”
   3. Refer to the presentation How to Build Intellectual Power for a possible reading lists
How To Build Intellectual Power
View more presentations from Ambeck Enterprise.
5. Each week listen to an interview and a speech by or about one of your invisible mentors from the list in your Self-Discovery Worksheet
6. Join a Book-of-the-Month Club. Two suggestions are:
   1. Book of the Month Club http://www.bomc.com
   2. Quality Paperback Book Club http://www.qpb.com
7. Subscribe to business book summaries and use them as a guide to decide which books are worth reading. Two good ones are:
   1. Audio-Tech Business Book Summaries http://store.audiotech.com
   2. Soundview Executive Book Summaries http://www.summary.com
8. Make professional development a fun time for the family. And, if you have a long commute to work, invest in:
   1. Unabridged books on CDs and tapes to listen to during the commute
   2. Audio programs that your family can listen to during family time or on road trips
9. Create a form to record information on the books that you have read, for easy reference.

Click on the comment link below and leave a note for me. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

For your research and writing needs, consider my firm Ambeck Enterprise for white papers, articles, fact sheets, anniversary booklets, you name it. Since I am the best kept secret you may not know this, but I have over 15 years research and writing experience. I KNOW content. And if you cannot figure out which books to read for professional development, I am your WOMAN. I can assist you with that too. Visit my sales page for resources such as The Invisible Mentor Toolkit to assist you in acquiring wisdom from a distance. For free white papers click here.

All book links are affiliate links.

Are you trying to master a subject? If you answered yes, mastering any subject matter takes a commitment of anywhere from 5,000 to 10,000 hours (Read the article Did Malcolm Gladwell Rip Me Off? by Michael Masterson), depending on which statistics you decide to believe. To begin the process of mastering a subject, answer the questions below. While you are reading the books identified at the library, record the information in the Subject Mastery Template. This information is taken from The Invisible Mentor Toolkit.

How to Read to Master a Subject

1. Describe the specific knowledge that you are trying to acquire
2. On a blank sheet of paper do a brain dump for 15 minutes, writing down as much as you know about the topic
3. List the pioneers and subject matter experts in the field. Have they written any books on the subject?
4. Compile a bibliography of books that could potentially help to master the subject?
   1. List books written by pioneers and subject matter experts
   2. Check the bibliography of books written by pioneers and subject matter experts
   3. Ask colleagues for book recommendations
   4. Check the bibliography of scholarly journals and books on the topic
   5. Search the catalogues, or ask a librarian at a good reference library to find titles
5. Spend half a day at the library inspecting[1]the books listed in the compiled bibliography to:
   1. Whittle down the number of titles on the list
   2. Get a cursory understanding of the topic
   3. Determine which  books say anything important about the topic of interest
6. With a cursory understanding of the subject:
   1. Identify the 10 core concepts/ideas that form the basis of the subject
   2. Clarify the information that you are seeking. Distinguish between ‘must know’ and ‘nice to know’
   3. How will you know when you have found the answers?
7. Inspect the books identified as relevant
   1. Find the most relevant passages and record page numbers
   2. By author, record the information that covers each of the 10 core concepts/ideas (Refer to the Subject Mastery Template)
8. Read and analyze all the information gathered
   1. Distill the information germane to the subject
   2. Compare and contrast the information on each of the 10 core concepts/ideas
   3. Interpret the 10 core concepts/ideas
   4. Concentrate on understanding the core concepts/ideas
9. Search online for a site that offer tests on the subject and take the test

[1] Refer to How To Read A Book: The Classic Guide to Intelligent Reading to find out how to quickly inspect a book.

Subject Mastery Template

Title of the Book/Author

Why is Author Qualified to Answer?

Key Concept 1

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept 2

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept 3

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept 4

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept 5

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept6

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept7

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept8

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept9

Documentation/Page Found

Key Concept10

Documentation/Page Found

Conclusions by Authors

What are the Weaknesses of the Authors’ Arguments, Evidence and Conclusions?

Special Notes

And whatever you learn, be sure to teach it to others so that you can cement the information into your memory. Let me know what you think about the questions.  I am committed to assist you on your professional development journey. If there are additional ways that I may be of service please let me know.

Click on the comment link below and leave a note for me. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed.

For your research and writing needs, consider my firm Ambeck Enterprise for white papers, articles, fact sheets, anniversary booklets, you name it. Since I am the best kept secret you may not know this, but I have over 15 years research and writing experience. I KNOW content. And if you cannot figure out which books to read for professional development, I am your WOMAN. I can assist you with that too. Visit my sales page for resources such as The Invisible Mentor Toolkit to assist you in acquiring wisdom from a distance. For free white papers click here.

Related Articles

The Precursor to How to Master a Subject
How to Fill the Information Gap
How to Fill the Information Gap Part Two
How to Fill the Information Gap (when you don’t know there is a gap) Part Three

Photo Credit: Google via Apture

Recently someone who I know asked me where the food court was in the mall close by, so I started giving him directions. He asked if I could go with him and I thought about it and said yes, not much arm twisting needed. We go into the mall and he tells me that he has never been inside before. I am quite astonished because he works right beside the mall. He adds that he would have gotten lost had I not been with him, and when I thought about it he was correct. I  have been going to that mall for nearly 15 years so I do not even have to think about it, I know where everything is. I assumed that because the food court was easy for me to find that it would be easy for others to find as well. The reality is that there are many aisles that you could get lost in and the layout isn’t perfect. And, it doesn’t help that three malls are connected to each other underground.

What assumptions do you make that could possibly trip up others? Are the instructions for your training products clear? When you give directions from point A to B, do you leave out landmarks, distance and possible time it takes, to help others gauge if they are on track? Have you ever been frustrated when the instructions to perform a task wasn’t clear? The assumptions you make, are they friends or foe? Do they assist you or hamper you? Do they make you appear credible?

The next time you have to explain something, write or  give instructions or directions, before you begin, pause and think before you do anything. Also think about what you would like if you were the recipient of the explanation, directions or instructions.

We can take making assumptions even further, what assumptions do we make daily? What assumptions do we bring to the table? What assumptions do we make about others? What assumptions do we make about how things get done? And so on and so on… Do all these assumptions that we make cloud our judgment and prevent us from being creative?

In Did You Spot the Gorilla by Richard Wiseman, which I have talked about before, there is an exercise with the face of a clock in Roman numerals. A few of the numbers are missing and you are asked to fill in the missing numbers. I finished the exercise in record time and found much to my dismay, that just like everyone, for the number four which we are taught is IV, on all watches and clocks it is IIII, except for the Big Ben in London. I made a reasonable assumption, but it was an incorrect one. Please read Could You Swear to It?

One of the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is to don’t make assumptions, but as an information professional, I have to make assumptions because I never have all the information that I require so I have to fill in the gaps based on experience, so perhaps the agreement should be make assumptions with caution. Are there specific instances where you are forced to make assumptions, how do you handle them? So, the way you deal with assumptions in instances like these, is to state what you do know, what you don’t know, and what you think.

What are your thoughts? Please keep the information flowing, click on the comment link below and leave a note for me. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

For your research and writing needs, consider my firm Ambeck Enterprise for white papers, articles, fact sheets, anniversary booklets, you name it. Since I am the best kept secret you may not know this, but I have over 15 years research and writing experience. I KNOW content. And if you cannot figure out which books to read for professional development, I am your WOMAN. I can assist you with that too. Visit my sales page for resources such as The Invisible Mentor Toolkit to assist you in acquiring wisdom from a distance. For free white papers click here.

Photo Credit: Zemanta and Apture (The photo is of Richard Wiseman)

What does success mean to you? Have you ever stopped to think about it? If you do not know what success means to you, how will you know when you have attained it? Take a look at the definitions of success by the interviewees, does any of the definitions resonate with you? Which ones and why? If you crafted a story of success, what would it look like? Sound like? Feel like? What is your story of success?

How do you define success?

Nathalie Lussier
I define success by the way you feel, and I know that some people define it by money, your house and by more tangible stuff. But I think that success is more about the inside and how you feel on a day-to-day basis. If you feel like you are contributing and being rewarded for what you are doing and feeling comfortable in your space in the world, then you are a success.

Paul Copcutt
Being rewarded for doing what you love to do and that lets you lead the life you want to live.

Duke Redbird
Success is getting what you want, but happiness is wanting what you get.

Ron LeBlanc
I think success really is living with your passions. If you are a busker on the street and you’re playing music, or you’re trading on the floor or you’re being a mother, if you are doing what you want to do, that’s success. Living to your talents and your passions is really the measure of success.

Gina McAdam
Being content with what you have, but knowing you have journeyed from here to there and not stood still.

In your opinion, what is the formula for success?

Nathalie Lussier
The formula for success will depend on the person. For entrepreneurs it’s putting yourself out there and deciding what you want to do, how you’re going to help people and going forward and creating great information and being there for people, but also taking a look at all the things that contribute to success, such as are you sleeping enough, are you eating well, are you exercising and creating a legacy, which is one of the things that will be there for generations to come.

Paul Copcutt
Find out what you are passionate about and figure out a way to live a life doing it.

Duke Redbird
Success is when you get what you want.

Ron LeBlanc
If you are blessed with a clearly defined and delineated passion, the formula for success is to be brave and to jump into that passion of interest.

Gina McAdam
The same as luck – the marriage of preparation and opportunity.

As you’ll notice none of the definitions and formulas for success talks about the attainment of money, is that significant? Success is very personal and there are many success formulas. What’s your definition? What’s your formula? In another post, I’ll include some additional and definitions and formulas for  success.

Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please click on the comment link below and leave a note for me. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

For your research and writing needs, consider my firm Ambeck Enterprise for white papers, articles, fact sheets, anniversary booklets, you name it. Since I am the best kept secret you may not know this, but I have over 15 years research and writing experience. I KNOW content. And if you cannot figure out which books to read for professional development, I am your WOMAN. I can assist you with that too. Visit my sales page for resources such as The Invisible Mentor Toolkit to assist you in acquiring wisdom from a distance. For free white papers click here.

Photo Credit: Google via Apture