The Invisible Mentor

Archive for January, 2010

Below are two tales from Aesop’s Fables, what lessons can they teach you in the workplace?

The Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

A Wolf found great difficulty in getting at the sheep owing to the vigilance of the shepherd and his dogs. But one day it found the skin of a sheep that had been flayed and thrown aside, so it put it on over its own pelt and strolled down among the sheep. The Lamb that belonged to the sheep, whose skin the Wolf was wearing, began to follow the Wolf in the Sheep’s clothing; so, leading the Lamb a little apart, he soon made a meal off her, and for some time he succeeded in deceiving the sheep, and enjoying hearty meals.

Appearances are deceptive.

The Bald Man and the Fly

There was once a Bald Man who sat down after work on a hot summer’s day. A Fly came up and kept buzzing about his bald pate, and stinging him from time to time. The Man aimed a blow at his little enemy, but acks palm came on his head instead; again the Fly tormented him, but this time the Man was wiser and said:

“You will only injure yourself if you take notice of despicable enemies.”

What do you think of the fables? The application for me from The Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing, is that things are seldom as they seem and you should do your due diligence. Do not be quick to jump on the bandwagon, investigate first. And, in desperation, some people will do whatever it takes to get what they want.The fable teaches us to operate with integrity.

As I was reading the lesson learned from The Bald Man and the Fly, I remembered something I read recently, “It’s none of your business what others think about you.” The lesson is very apt for office gossip. What other things come to mind? And I am also reminded of one of the four agreements, never take things personally.

To read more fables please click here.

Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

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Who is in your support network? Who are you going to call on when you are in a tight spot? Recently,  Josh Hanagarne,  from the World’s Strongest Librarian wrote a fun post titled “I’ve Joined A Gang That You Shouldn’t Mess With.” In the post he talks about the people he would summon if he were in a tight spot: Pinhead from Hellraiser, Dalton From Roadhouse, John Mclane from Die Hard, Blacula, and Bill The Butcher. As you can see there are only men on his team.

Liz Muirhead came back with “I’ve Joined a Gang That You Shouldn’t Mess With Part II” in response to Josh’s post. On her team she would like to have Linda Hamilton as Sarah Connor in T2, Uma Thurman in Kill Bill 1&2, Kate Beckinsale as Selene in Underworld, Jessica Biel as Abigail Whistler in Blade: Trinity,  and Sigourney Weaver as Lt. Ellen Ripley in Aliens. Liz has an all female team that she would call on.

I thought about it and decided to join in the fun. If I were in a tight spot, personally or professionally here are the five people that I would like to have on my team:

Anja Creed, lead character in Alex Archer’s Rogue Angel series.

In the book Anja is an archaeologist who goes on unique digs. But what I like about her is that she often uses her brain to get her out of tight spots. She has excellent analytical skills and knows how to fill in the gaps. She is a questioner and exercises due diligence in most cases. If force is called for, she also knows how to kick some serious ass.

Richard Dean Anderson‘s character MacGyver from the hit TV show of the same name

MacGyver was always able to work with whatever he had to find a very workable solution.

Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein said, “You can never solve a problem on the level on which it was created.” With any problem that I had, Einstein would help me to rise above  it and uncover an innovative solution.

Estee Lauder

I would like Estee Lauder on my team because she was a woman ahead of her time and she would assist me in thinking differently and taking the path less traveled.

Thomas Alva Edison

Persistence pays and I’d like someone who has lived it. Edison keeps at it and when I get frustrated I would like someone to encourage me to go on until I found the right solution.

The team that I have chosen could watch my back in many different situations, and collectively, I think they would help to bring out my best self. And I would learn from them in the process, isn’t that what life is about? I enjoyed writing this post because it forced me to think, and the interesting thing is that I had no idea who I would choose when I started writing the post. Who would you want on your team to watch your back, and why? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

Related Posts

I’ve Joined A Gang That You Shouldn’t Mess With

I’ve Joined a Gang That You Shouldn’t Mess With Part II

Image Credit: via Apture

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Did you say thank you today? Which five books, one music CD and movie would you like to have on a deserted island? What does success mean to you and how do you define it? Read Gina’s responses in Part Two of  her interview. Use this information because we are on this journey together. Let’s learn from the wisdom and experiences of others.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.

I’m a wife and mother who runs her own strategic marketing and communications consultancy in London, with a portfolio of very exciting clients.

All the people I work with, both clients and associates, are smart, ambitious and great at what they do. It’s a great fun being a Director of a famous restaurant and food company like Cafe Spice Namaste in London; we’ve just launched a new product in a very fashionable department store, and our Chef Patron, Cyrus Todiwala, has just been awarded an OBE by the Queen. Editing Leader, an e-zine for the global luxury hospitality market (http://www.profile-recruitment.com) is fantastic too, giving me the excuse to visit and meet some incredible places and people around the  world. I also work with a brilliant communications expert who happens to handle PR  in the UK for the world’s largest hotel brand. Everything I do is very stimulating and over the years, my work has been extremely diverse.

The fact that I work with people with similar values to mine helps. After the ‘me-first’ culture of the last decade, a sense of community and collaboration is important. Being part of peer networks, such as the Worshipful Company of Marketors, the City livery company for marketing professionals, is excellent because it has a civic and charity focus as well.  I’m also very keen to help raise the profile and economic empowerment of women, through organisations like the 50,000-strong The International Alliance for Women (TIAW), of which I’m a Board member. They do wonderful things like promote micro-credit, mentoring and entrepreneurship.

As an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Nurture the people who give to you, always give back. Also, someone I spoke to recently said that one of his mottos was ‘you can’t have two faces’. Treat everyone with equal respect. That is so true.

How do you integrate your personal and professional life?

In my heart, my family – including my extended family – takes precedence, which is probably owing to my Asian roots. They know this, so their behaviours enable me to give my work precedence if that makes sense.

What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?

That I didn’t spend enough time with my two younger sisters when I was growing up. I was too busy wanting to be ‘one of the boys’ as I’m the middle child with two older brothers!

What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?

Respect yourself and all people; b) never give up and that’s different from cutting your losses c) know that you can’t know everything, d) trust in Someone or something higher; e) never forget to say thank you.

When you have some down time, how do you spend it?

A good book, French choral music or a Bach cantata. I also enjoy listening to Beethoven’s piano concertos, particularly when rendered by Mitsuko Uchida.

What process do you use to generate great ideas?

Reading almost everything I can get hold of, including adverts in the tube. Walking around London. Talking to people.

What’s your favourite quotation and why?

In dreams begin responsibilities – Yeats. It shows that imagination and desire aren’t enough; we have to take action to make things come true.

How do you define success?

Being content with what you have, but knowing you have journeyed from here to there and not stood still.

In your opinion what’s the formula for success?

The same as luck – the marriage of preparation and opportunity.

What are the steps you took to succeed in your field?

Generally, I was never afraid to try something new and see where it would lead.  I didn’t have fixed ideas and notions about myself. When I did, I knocked on the right doors. But I was lucky always to have an orbit of good and wise people around me for support.

If trusted friends could introduce you to five people that you’ve always wanted to meet, who would you choose? And what would you say to them?

Audrey Hepburn – ‘How did you do it?’ – Her elegance and style are almost cliche, but she is after all an icon. She was apparently a very decent person, and she took her UN charity work extremely seriously. She had an aura of quiet dignity.

Virginia Woolf – ‘Why did you do it?’ – She was the subject of my Masters dissertation years back at Newcastle University, and I focused on her voluminous diaries.  Her death was abrupt and premature, although not surprising given her history of illness, and it deprived literature of a razor sharp pen. I like the way she to an extent turned her back on stifling upper-class Victorian tradition and was unashamed to use her brains, talent and art to make a living. To me, she’s part of the tradition of great women adventurers and innovators — she introduced us to a whole new landscape of writing.

Siri Hustvedt – ‘How did you learn to think and write like that?’ – Her books, specifically What I Loved and The Sorrows of An American are deep and unusual character studies and she offers not so much plots as enquiries. They’re quite unnerving, and always beautifully written.

Hillary Clinton – ‘What keeps you going?’ – She is a marvel to watch, because she never stops pushing boundaries.  I was trying to choose between her and Nancy Pelosi, but running for President, being a Senator and now Secretary of State nudges her a couple of feet forward. Few make the mistake now of referencing her as the wife of Bill Clinton.

F Scott Fitzgerald – ‘Who was Jay Gatsby?’ – Another writer, I’m afraid, but the truth of The Great Gatsby and the fascinating circus that was the jazz age revisited us in the last three decades, imploding less than two years ago. So much been written about them, but I don’t think we’ll ever unlock the mysteries lurking behind our modern day Jay Gatsbys.

Which one book had a profound impact on your life? What was it about this book that impacted you so deeply? Did you have an emotional or intellectual attachment to this book? Why?

Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell. I read it every year for four consecutive years in my teens. It was about honouring land, tradition and a way of life, but also about rebuilding things that had been destroyed and accepting change.

The noblest characters weren’t always the main ones, which has some universal truth  about it.

If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are five books that you would like to have with you and why? Summarize the book in two sentences.

The Bible – Timeless wisdom and, depending on the edition, arguably the best written novel in history – and every word rings true.

Gone with the Wind –Margaret Mitchell.  The American Civil War signals the end of an era.  One woman decides she must not only survive the change, but thrive in it.

A Summons to Memphis – Peter Taylor – Pulitzer Prize novel about a  son who discovers the meaning of forgiveness when summoned home to help his sisters keep an elderly father from remarrying.

New Hart’s Rules – The handbook of Style for Writers and Editors – All the guidance you need to get the technicalities right.

Letters Between Six Sisters – edited by Charlotte Moseley – the glamorous and scandalous Mitford girls, in their own words

Have you read any books that inspired you to start a business, service or invent “something”? If yes, which book?

No book in particular, but I have always read business journals and magazines – Fortune, Business Week, the Economist.  As it happens, as much for the style as the content.

What one music CD and movie would you like to have with you (on the deserted island) and why?

French Choral Music by the Choir of Clare College, Cambridge directed by Timothy Brown.

Shoot the Moon, a film directed by Alan Parker. Ostensibly sad, but ultimately life affirming…especially for women with ‘Faith’

What excites you about life?

People, and the endless possibilities for innovation and reinvention.

How do you nurture your soul?

Good music and good books. The Zoroastrians – and I have met many to admire — have a good mantra: good thoughts, good words, good deeds, which seems to be a recipe for peace of mind.

If you had a personal genie and she gave you one wish, what would you wish for? Or, if I gave you a magic wand, what would you use it for?

That my son grows up to be decent and successful, in that order.

Complete the following, I am happy when…

I am working, and when surrounded by family and friends.

What aspects of Gina’s story can you apply to your situation? What would be your five great ideas and takeaways from this interview? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

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About Gina McAdam

Before founding Stratemarco, a successful London-based marketing and communications consultancy, in 2003, Gina was Head of Marketing and later Head of Policy Development & Public Affairs for the National Training Organisation for the UK hospitality and tourism sector. Today, she is a highly-regarded communications expert whose work brings her into regular contact with leaders of some of the best known brands in the UK and global hospitality and tourism industry. Highly versatile, she also undertakes assignments for key public,private and voluntary organisations beyond the sector.

Gina was raised near Washington DC and Manila. Moving away from the family traditions of law, banking, agriculture and medicine, she started her career in advertising for Ace-Compton/Saatchi & Saatchi in Manila where she handled various Proctor & Gamble accounts, and at J Walter Thompson Advertising Company, handling the Anne Klein, Cacharel and SC Johnson brands. After that, she travelled extensively, writing and teaching in Madrid and working in publishing in New York. Today, she is regularly invited to contribute pieces to publications in the Far East – it is her way of keeping in touch with her Asian roots.

Highly committed to diversity in the workplace, Gina has been on the board of City Women’s Network (CWN) and is now on the board of The International Alliance of Women (TIAW). She is a member of the European Professional Women’s Network and a Changemaker for the UK charity Working Families.

Gina is a Freeman of the Worshipful Company of Marketors, and a member of the International Association of Business Communicators (IABC), for whom she was a guest speaker at the 2008 IABC Eurocomm Conference in Barcelona. She is a member of the Institute of Director, and holds an MA in English & American Literature from the University of Newcastle upon Tyne and is an alumnus of De La Salle University, Manila and Henley Management College, Windsor.

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This week on Tuesday and Wednesday I present Gina McAdam. For new subscribers I interview highly accomplished people from all walks of life and locations to share their wisdom and experience. All interviewees are asked the same questions, so it’s always interesting to see the diversity of responses. Gina like many successful people plans for her day the night before by checking her schedule, what about you? Her responses to the question, “What are three threats to your business and how are you handling them?” is quite surprising so look for her responses. Her response to “What’s one core message you received from your mentors?” is ” Don’t hide your light under a bushel,” resonated with me, and I’m sure will resonate with others, especially women because we often tone down our accomplishments and are often the best kept secret. I know that people are often surprised by some of my accomplishments. Because listening is such a critical skill please zero in on her response to her biggest failure.

There is a wealth of information that can assist us in attaining professional success, this is my contribution to getting you there.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.

I’m a wife and mother who runs her own strategic marketing and communications consultancy in London, with a portfolio of very exciting clients.

I’m steeped in the commercial world now, but a few years ago I was involved a lot more in government-funded programmes. There was the strategic planning and delivery of the government’s agenda for upskilling the workforce through vocational training. I even produced a study on the problem of ‘worklessness’ and prepared enterprise development strategy reports for London.  A totally different spectrum.

The fact that I work with people with similar values to mine helps. After the ‘me-first’ culture of the last decade, a sense of community and collaboration is important. Being part of peer networks, such as the Worshipful Company of Marketors, the City livery company for marketing professionals, is excellent because it has a civic and charity focus as well.  I’m also very keen to help raise the profile and economic empowerment of women, through organisations like the 50,000-strong The International Alliance for Women (TIAW), of which I’m a Board member. They do wonderful things like promote micro-credit, mentoring and entrepreneurship.

What’s a typical day like for you?

Up at 6am and sometimes before, check my emails, run through the things I have to do for the day. If I’m not headed out the door, wait till 8.30 or 9am to start the phone calls. Lunch with a friend, client or associate – sometimes that’s one person rolled into one. Meetings or work delivering on projects occupy the main part of the day.

How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

I’m always excited about what a new day brings, and the chance to learn something I didn’t know. In a role that calls for dealing with people, the interaction is the thing. Even old friends and contacts bring something fresh each time you see them.

If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

I sometimes wonder what would have happened had I accepted an offer in my twenties to write in Florence for a year, shutting out the rest of the world.  But that was just my parents being indulgent and I was quite romantic then.

What’s the most important business (or other) discovery you’ve made in the past year?

If you’re good at what you do and are open and resourceful, regardless of the economic climate, there will always be something for you.

What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

Although my work is essentially marketing and communications, it straddles many different industries. One of the biggest changes has to be the rise of digital and specifically social media, and my clients are all very excited about the possibilities of Twitter, You Tube, Facebook and even Linkedin.  People will always demand solid, well-crafted and thought out content, but the channels and tools available to express them are revolutionising the way people do business and communicate with their customers.

In terms of the hospitality and tourism industry, where many of my clients sit, I would say that more women across the world are taking on the big operational roles of general management, or becoming managing directors and CEOs.  There is also the trend for international companies to hire local talent rather than merely parachute in expats. One of the oldest, most prestigious hotels in Asia appointed its first female, Chinese general manager a few years ago. And it’s been a great success. Also, there’s a lot more use of new technologies, and of course the consumer’s awareness of the environment has wrought positive change.

What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

Three questions come to mind – can I keep up the energy levels? Are my clients safe and secure? Will my family always be this supportive? In terms of the first, I try to look after my health; second, I try to add as much value as possible to my clients’ business; and third, I show my husband and son that they are more important than anything.

What’s unique about the service that you provide?

I think it’s the ‘personal touch’ and becoming part of my clients’ team and not just a service provider. It’s important that they know you are with them every step of the  way.

Also, because of my international background – I was born and raised in Manila, but spent some of my formative years in the US, studied in the UK and worked in Asia, America and Europe, the last twenty years in London  – I can bring the positive sensibilities of different worlds to the table.

What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

I tend to operate amongst fantastic, hard-working ‘can do’ people and this field is awash with them. If there’s anything we do badly, it’s not stopping often or long enough to relax and smell the roses. I’m as guilty as the rest, often working during holidays too. Not good! I’m sure we’re all trying to work smarter, but in our field, we have to keep up with the speed of communication.

Describe a major business (or other) challenge you had and how you resolved it.

It was a situation involving divergent business practices and beliefs.  When this occurs, you are best to cut your losses.

What lessons did you learn in the process?

Sometimes you just have to walk away.

Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

I was moonlighting as a journalist at university when I was assigned to interview a hotshot female advertising executive in Manila. After that, she asked me if I’d ever consider going into advertising after graduation. She became my first ever boss. Her name was J M Rebueno, and I’ve never forgotten her.

Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

It was probably a personal one, over a decade ago. I lost a whole year’s joy with one of the very best people I’ll ever know because of something silly. But we’re now closer than ever and a lot of my success is down to my friend’s deep and abiding support. The lesson is always to listen to what the other person says, even when they’re not saying it.

What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its reoccurrence?

I try not to dwell on setbacks.

What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

Deciding to leave Europe for New York, after having lived and worked happily in Madrid for more than three years.  But it was something I had to do. As it happens, New York eventually led me back to London, where I have been ever since.

What are three events that helped to shape your life?

Just one, really. My father’s death in 1990 was a huge blow, as he had been a great mentor and source of wisdom.  Outwardly he was a traditionalist but his liberal spirit allowed all his children the freedom to choose their own lives. The death of a parent catapults you into the next generation, they say, and it’s true. Your whole perspective changes and suddenly you feel much, much older.

What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

Hands down, my son Harry.

How did mentors influence your life?

Their kindness and generosity, sharing their time, ideas, experiences and contacts, impressed me deeply. This gave strength when one needed it, and also a key through many doors that may have otherwise remained locked or unnoticed. Their bright example is what made me want to be a mentor as well. In 2008, I was thrilled to be named Shine Outstanding Mentor of the Year. Shine is a national industry award for female talent management in the UK hospitality and tourism industry. It was started in London by two ladies of Italian origin who wanted to make a difference to how women were seen and wanted to see themselves in the industry.

What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

Don’t hide your light under a bushel.

Which resources (books, movies, training etc.) did your mentors recommend to you?

One fabulous mentor, Diane Morris who runs TIAW, recommended that I join and get involved in good networks. I have never looked back since. Someone who is less a mentor than a caring colleague has always signposted me to great articles, events, people and organisations.  Through him I’ve got involved in the Oxford Brookes University Bacchus Mentoring programme for final year hospitality management students. I now mentor a very motivated girl from Sweden and a very bright young man from Hong Kong.

What aspects of Gina’s story can you apply to your situation? What would be your five great ideas and takeaways from this interview? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the right side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

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About Gina McAdam

Before founding Stratemarco, a successful London-based marketing and communications consultancy, in 2003, Gina was Head of Marketing and later Head of Policy Development & Public Affairs for the National Training Organisation for the UK hospitality and tourism sector. Today, she is a highly-regarded communications expert whose work brings her into regular contact with leaders of some of the best known brands in the UK and global hospitality and tourism industry. Highly versatile, she also undertakes assignments for key public,private and voluntary organisations beyond the sector.

Gina was raised near Washington DC and Manila. Moving away from the family traditions of law, banking, agriculture and medicine, she started her career in advertising for Ace-Compton/Saatchi & Saatchi in Manila where she handled various Proctor & Gamble accounts, and at J Walter Thompson Advertising Company, handling the Anne Klein, Cacharel and SC Johnson brands. After that, she travelled extensively, writing and teaching in Madrid and working in publishing in New York. Today, she is regularly invited to contribute pieces to publications in the Far East – it is her way of keeping in touch with her Asian roots.

Highly committed to diversity in the workplace, Gina has been on the board of City Women’s Network (CWN) and is now on the board of The International Alliance of Women (TIAW). She is a member of the European Professional Women’s Network and a Changemaker for the UK charity Working Families.

Gina is a Freeman of the Worshipful Company of Marketors, and a member of the International Association of Business Communicators (IABC), for whom she was a guest speaker at the 2008 IABC Eurocomm Conference in Barcelona. She is a member of the Institute of Director, and holds an MA in English & American Literature from the University of Newcastle upon Tyne and is an alumnus of De La Salle University, Manila and Henley Management College, Windsor.

I got the idea for this post after reading Book Learning vs. Experience a guest post from Adrienne Carlson on the World’s Strongest Librarian blog. It’s a great post and in it she shows the pros of book learning and experience. I think that both are critical in today’s work environment. I learn in many ways which has served me well over the years. Anyone who has been reading this blog for a few months know that I am an avid read, as well as an active reader, so I am always interacting with the words on the page.

I am an introvert and very shy so I have well developed listening skills and I often hear things that the average person would miss. And I meditate so I am very aware of what’s going on around me, and learn things through observation. I have turned my weaknesses into strengths, what about you? Yes, there are times when I would love to be the life of the party, but it isn’t going to happen because of my personality.

How can you build your reading, listening and observation skills to transform yourself into a learning machine? How do you learn best? Are you an audio, visual or kinesthetic learner?

Understanding the way you learn best allows you to capitalize on your strengths and build up the areas where you are less strong. How important is it for you learn in multiple ways? And how might doing so enhance your life?

Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment. Many readers read this blog from other sites, so why don’t you pop over to The Invisible Mentor and subscribe (top on the left side) by email or RSS Feed. I created a Mini Learning Toolkit and you can grab a copy by clicking here.

Reference & Photo Credit: via Apture

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