The Invisible Mentor

Archive for November, 2009

This is the second part of my interview with Dennie Theodore, click here to read Part One. I conduct these interviews so that you may learn from them. Please let me know what you think. How do you keep on going, how do you motivate yourself? Most accomplished people are self motivated because they love what they are doing, do you? How do you distinguish yourself from your colleagues and even competitors? What’s unique about the  service you provide? This is important even if you are working for an organization? What kind of life lessons have you learned so far? How do you integrate your personal and professional life? These are some of the questions that Dennie answered.

How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?

I promise myself one day a week to read late in bed and sleep in …. Not necessarily in the same 24 hr period.

What’s the most important business (or other) discovery you’ve made in the past year?

The best skill to have is the ability to adapt.

What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

Women seen as necessary in leadership positions to move projects and business forward.

What are the three threats to your business, your success, and how are you handling them?

The usual… Similar Circles is run out of my kitchen with no funding, no time and is too GTA-centric. I’m handling them by asking my community to pitch in and they’ve been giving with both hands.

What’s unique about the service that you provide?

I’m not trying to offer a 10-step “how to” process, but rather open discussion on “why to”. By creating an emotional/mental comfort zone, folks feel better about mentoring and networking.

What do you observe most people in your field doing badly that you think you do well?

It’s easier to point out what others are doing well – because my strength is seeing success in others and helping promote it.

Tell me about your big break and who gave you.

I’ve had several careers and many folks to thank in each one. My biggest break was my kid being willing to try anything once with me – from moving around the country to eating cereal for supper if that’s all we had. As one of my top priorities, he could have made my explorations difficult instead of participating as he has.

What has been your biggest disappointment in your life – and what are you doing to prevent its re-occurrence?

There isn’t enough time in the day… considering giving up sleep.

What’s an accomplishment that you are proudest of?

I learned to speak up, to forgive and to listen more.

How do you integrate your personal and professional life?

I try to be the same person in all circumstances. I don’t hide one from the other. I allow myself to have an emotional response every now and then J

What’s a major regret that you’ve had in life?

I’ll never win an Oscar. But I suppose first I have to write a screenplay.

What are five life lessons that you have learned so far?

1. Speak up
2. Ask questions
3. Speak out
4. Forgive
5. Listen

When you have some down time, how do you spend it?

Reading, baking, walking/hiking, doing laundry.

What process do you use to generate great ideas?

I read, read, read. And then I talk about it with friends till I figure out what I’m thinking.  Then I write, write, write.

What’s your favourite quotation and why?

It changes. Today it’s “May you live the life you’ve earned” by TO Jazz singer Julie Michels

How do you define success?

Success is not measured by how many hours you put in or how many projects went in under your watch. It is measured by the legacy you leave and the value you provided along the way through both your influence and achievements.

In your opinion what’s the formula for success?

Walk your talk.

If trusted friends could introduce you to five people that you’ve always wanted to meet, who would you choose? And what would you say to them?

Only 5?? Queen Elizabeth I; Carol Burnett; Katherine Hepburn; Terry Gilliam and Ray Bradbury …  I would ask: “Can I make you dinner?”

What excites you about life?

Humour, kindness, whipped cream.

How do you nurture your soul?

Same but I put the whipped cream on pound cake.

If you had a personal genie and she gave you one wish, what would you wish for? Or, if I gave you a magic wand, what would you use it for?

My selfish wish is funding for a webspace…  my unselfish wish is that all children around the world be given love, food and shelter in that order.

About Dennie Theodore

a professional writer, facilitator, strategic planner and business manager, contributing to artistic and business projects across Canada and internationally. She has a long and successful history in many communities and is known as a caring mentor, negotiator and leader.

A business and artistic chameleon, Dennie offers a range of leadership, communication, strategic planning and change management skills. Dennie has brought her many skills to bear for such places as Atlantis Systems International, TD Bank, AT&T, Nortel, and The Citadel Theatre. She served on the boards of Cahoots Theatre Projects and Mixed Company, produced the Peer-to-Peer Conference with CWC and IBM, and currently runs the Similar Circles blog and events.

Recently named to the TIAW Making a Difference roster for 2009 , Dennie is a recognized leader and speaker in many industries.

Related Post

Interview With Dennie Theodore Part One

Anyone wishing to succeed personally and professionally must possess the “right” knowledge. Acquiring the “right” knowledge means understanding why you are learning what you are learning. There are specific situations that foster learning: meaningful projects, available support and resources and time to reflect on the tasks at hand, and what has already been done. Also, learning is enhanced when learners know their learning styles: visual, auditory and kinesthetic.

What is your preferred way to consume information?

• Visual learners: Want to see how something is done. Benefit most from maps, diagrams, charts, pictures, and films. If you show them, they will understand. They will likely say, “I see what you mean.”
• Auditory learners: Prefer to hear explanations and like to talk their way through things. Benefit most from traditional learning techniques, where the leader presents the information. They will likely say, “I hear what you say.”
• Kinesthetic learners: Want to get lots of hands-on experience so they can feel how something is done. Learn fastest when they are involved in the activity, such as science labs, drama presentations, skits, and field trips. They will likely say, “I feel what you mean.”

How we learn

A research report by The William Glasser Institute about how we learn indicates that we learn:

• 10 percent of what we Read
• 20 percent of what we Hear
• 30 percent of what we See
• 50 percent of what we See and Hear
• 70 percent of what we Discuss with Others
• 80 percent of what we Experience Personally
• 95 percent of what we Teach to Others

How can you use this information to your advantage?

To acquire knowledge for a reason, and be able to apply that knowledge, requires developing a learning strategy which uses all the information presented above.

Step 1

• In what area do you need to build your knowledge base to become more valuable to your employer, industry and your customers?
• Why is it important for you to learn this information? Promotion? Prestige? New job? Start a business?
• Identify the unique leaders (invisible mentors) who you can learn things from in the area that you are trying to build up
• Start to acquire knowledge in the identified area

Step 2

• If you do not know already, take a test to identify your predominant learning style
• Consume the information you want to learn in your predominant learning style

Step 3

• Apply your new found knowledge by using the information at work
• Discuss what you have learned with your peers, and others you know who would be interested
• Create a presentation to teach the information to others

By following these three simple steps, you will acquire knowledge for a specific reason, subsequently learning things that really matter to you and that can make a tangible difference in your life.

How might you use this information? Let’s keep the information flowing, please comment.

Video Credit & Definition via Apture

There are many lessons around us, if we but take the time to BE instead of DO. Many of these lessons we can learn from successful people, many who are further along the path that we are traveling, or have already completed the journey.

Have you ever wondered what makes a highly accomplished individual tick? I have! I have also wondered what motivates them and how they stay motivated. Over the past five years, I have interviewed over a hundred successful people, and one of the many questions that I ask them is “What is your favorite quotation and why?”

These individuals love a good quote, and they have that special one which resonates with them down to their core. They often use that quote for inspiration, and have it in plain sight where they can readily see it. One individual indicated that he has been using the same quote for inspiration for over 20 years. Quotes are very important to these people and serve many functions in their lives.

Over the years I have learned from these very successful interviewees, and I would like to share some of what I have learned with you. I have culled 10 powerful quotes, and have also included the reasons why they resonate with the interviewees.

After you have read the quotes, you will better understand these people, and I am sure you will agree that the quotes will also add a touch of brilliance to your communications.

Stephanie MacKendrick’s Favorite Quote and Why

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” Margaret Meade

The quote says that change can happen from every one of us, from small groups. It doesn’t have to be a big project, a big organization with a big mission or mandate. We can all contribute to changing.

Maria Nemeth’s Favorite Quote and Why

“Miracles rest not so much upon healing power coming suddenly near us from afar, but upon our perceptions being made finer, so that for the moment our eyes can see and our ears can hear what has been there around us always.” Willa Cather

It’s a wonderful quote about miracles. People think that miracles are things that happen to us suddenly from on high. I like this quote because it’s hopeful, it says that I do not have to do anything extraordinary. All I need to do is wake up and see what’s been here waiting for me all the time.

Jim Rohn‘s Favorite Quote and Why

“Nothing can resist a human will that will stake even its existence on the extent of its purpose.” Benjamin Disraeli

This quote challenges the human spirit to ultimate possibility – give it all you’ve got. Become all you were designed to become. It simply means do or die.

Suzanne Gibson’s Favorite Quote and Why

“What stirs the mind or touches the heart, will undoubtedly move the feet.” Donald Murphy

I feel an affinity to the quote because I am overwhelmed by all that’s going on in the world, and I often wonder what I can do as one person. This quote tells me that if we can inspire others and feed their hearts and stimulate their minds we can motivate action for positive change.

Gail Blanke’s Favorite Quote and Why

“There is no way it is, there is only the way you say it is. The universe hasn’t made up its mind about you. It only knows what you show it today. You are the Inventor; your life is the invention. You get to make it up, so make it up good.” Gail Blanke, Between Trapezes

This is my favorite quote because I’m passionate about persuading people that they get to decide how good their life will be!

Gabriel Draven’s Favorite Quote and Why

“To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.” Mark Twain

“There are two things you need for success: courage and ignorance.” Gabriel Draven (Inspired by Mark Twain)

This modified quote has kept on coming back to me over the past couple of years, and it’s pretty dead on.

Claire Hoy’s Favorite Quotes and Why

“Worrying about something is like paying interest on a debt that you don’t even know if you owe.” Mark Twain

“It ain’t over till it’s over.” Yogi Berra

I view both quotes as great life lessons. In Mark Twain’s case he is saying that if you are going around and worrying and fretting how badly something is going to turn out, almost all the time it never turns out as badly as you perceived. In Berra’s case, if you don’t throw up your hands when things go wrong, but think it ain’t over and that you still have a chance, anything is possible.

Amelia Kassel’s Favorite Quote and Why

“There is nothing to fear but fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

It is so easy to feel fear when you are starting a business or taking risks. In life, you face many situations where it’s easy to feel fearful. This quote reminds me that I can do things that I wouldn’t otherwise try.

These quotes are not only instructive, but inspiring as well. What lessons might you learn from the quotes and the interviewees? And, in what ways might you use them?

Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment!

Think back to a time when you were operating in the zone and were unstoppable, what elements contributed to your off-the-charts performance? Great work environment? Committed team members? Work you loved and were good at?

Now, think back to another situation where you were stressed, floundering, unhappy, feeling devalued and constantly feeling that you had nothing to contribute, what elements were present? Toxic work environment? Overly demanding boss? Work you were unqualified to perform or work that did not feed your soul? People who did not have your best interest at heart?

There are situations where you flourish, and others where you wither and a little piece of you die each day. But, to live a more fulfilled life and experience happiness and success, it is important to increase the number of situations where you flourish. To do so requires identifying these situations to create more of them.

Honestly answer the following questions to start building more flourishing situations into your life:

• What are your strengths and weaknesses?
• What do you do well that others compliment you on?
• What are the things that you enjoy doing?
• Which things do you get so immersed in that you do not notice time flying by?
• What types of people do you work best with?
• When are you happiest?
• What excites you about life?
• What motivates you?
• If you had unlimited financial resources, what would you be doing?

The answers to the questions are pretty good indicators of what you should be doing more of. Integrate more of these situations – that feed your soul and make you flourish – into your life. In no time you will discover a major shift, and you will start to achieve success in all areas of your life.

I wither in situations with micro-managers, so I avoid such situations. How about you? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, let me know if you recognize the situations in which you flourish.

I met Dennie Theodore  through the Canadian Women in Communications about seven years ago. Though she is somewhat of an introvert, Dennie is great at networking, and goes out of her way to make others feel welcome. Dennie is using the skills that make her a great artist to excel in her corporate role at TD Bank in Canada.

So that you can get the most out of the interview it is quite extensive. For this blog post,  I will extract the career related and mentoring questions for you and I will post the other part of the interview tomorrow. Soon I will conduct the interviews using video and will have transcripts for people to download if that’s there preferred way to consume information.

In this interview, you’ll hear Dennie’s advice for people just starting out in the industry, the toughest decision she had to make, three events that shaped her life, advice from mentors, the books she’d love to have with her if stranded on a deserted island and so much more. A detailed biography is below and you can later visit her blog Similar Circles.

Tell me a little bit about yourself

Professional strategic planner, facilitator, writer and business manager, contributing to business and artistic projects across Canada and internationally. A long and successful history in many communities and known as a caring mentor, negotiator, leader and unappreciated parent.

What’s a typical day like for you?

Meetings; phone calls; copious amounts of tea; kind words and one good belly laugh.

Describe a major business (or other) challenge you had and how you resolved it

I negotiate and facilitate all day. It’s not the tactic or individual challenge but the overall approach which evolves with the needs of those involved.

What lessons did you learn in the process?

That everyone needs to feel like they were heard before a decision is made.

If you had to start over from scratch, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

Pick my battles with more care. Everything isn’t important to solve or soothe.

What’s one of the biggest advances in your industry over the past five years?

Women seen as necessary in leadership positions to move projects and business forward.

Describe one of your biggest failures. What lessons did you learn, and how did it contribute to a greater success?

I was on a not-for-profit board and I couldn’t make the president or artistic director understand  that my discomfort with a decision wasn’t personal, but that I felt it was going to lead them down a very difficult path. I learned that sometimes you have to let folks make mistakes and then welcome them back without saying “I told you so.” It has made me a better parent, a kind manager and left many bite marks in my tongue.

What’s one of the toughest decisions you’ve had to make and how did it impact your life?

To change careers from my heart’s desire to something ‘practical’. I’ve spent the last 10 years learning how to reblend the two and help others do the same.

What are three events that helped to shape your life?

I had a kid. I wrote a play. I learned to forgive myself my mistakes (although I still have angst over them).

How did mentors influence your life?

By believing in me. That’s the thing you need most when the world is feeling dark.

What’s one core message you received from your mentors?

To be yourself, ask questions and be an advocate for yourself and others.

As an Invisible Mentor, what is one piece of advice that you would give to readers?

Know yourself. Spend some time understanding your style, your fears, your desires and your skills. We all undersell ourselves.

What are the steps you took to succeed in your field?

Realized it wasn’t enough to dream but the practical bits needed planning. And that nothing succeeds if you don’t have passion – looked to put that back into my daily life.

What advice do you have for someone just starting out in your field?

Have as many cups of coffee/tea as you have time for in a week with people who are willing to sit with you. Don’t make it transactional – simply meet them to enjoy them and see where it leads. By doing so you’re building a personal community that will care with you and for you as you start to put your plans in action or require support to see them through.

Which one book had a profound impact on your life? What was it about this book that impacted you so deeply? Did you have an emotional or intellectual attachment to this book? Why?

Robert Holdstock – Mythago Wood Because our collective unconscious is our most wondrous way to connect.

If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are five books that you would like to have with you and why? Summarize the book in two sentences.

The Artist’s Way because then I’d have time to do the 7 days with no written word exercise.

A thesaurus

Andrew Lang’s Red Fairy Book – it will never become old

Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings – do you really need the summary?

Women who Run with the Wolves because I have yet to have a chance to finish it.

Have you read any books that inspired you to start a business, service or invent “something”? If yes, which book?

Ray Bradbury’s short story “To the Chicago Abyss” where the power of story and community can save humanity. I wanted to make a difference after reading that.

What one music CD and movie would you like to have with you (on the deserted island) and why?

Ultra Lounge’s Leopard Skin Sampler – it’ll never get old and will always be cheesy

The Wizard of Oz – because magic happens and I might get OFF the darn island

What can you learn from Dennie? How might your answers to the questions be different from Dennie’s? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment.

About Dennie Theodore

a professional writer, facilitator, strategic planner and business manager, contributing to artistic and business projects across Canada and internationally. She has a long and successful history in many communities and is known as a caring mentor, negotiator and leader.

A business and artistic chameleon, Dennie offers a range of leadership, communication, strategic planning and change management skills. Dennie has brought her many skills to bear for such places as Atlantis Systems International, TD Bank, AT&T, Nortel, and The Citadel Theatre. She served on the boards of Cahoots Theatre Projects and Mixed Company, produced the Peer-to-Peer Conference with CWC and IBM, and currently runs the Similar Circles blog and events.

Recently named to the TIAW Making a Difference roster for 2009 , Dennie is a recognized leader and speaker in many industries.

Book List

Mythago Wood

The Artist’s Way

Red Fairy Book

Lord of the Rings

Women who Run with the Wolves

Below are three tales taken from Aesop‘s Fables with incredible life lessons that we can apply today. Aesop’s Fables are in the public domain and you can download a copy from Project Gutenberg.

The Lion, the Fox, and the Beasts

The Lion once gave out that he was sick unto death and summoned the animals to come and hear his last Will and Testament. So the Goat came to the Lion’s cave, and stopped there listening for a long time. Then a Sheep went in, and before she came out a Calf came up to receive the last wishes of the Lord of the Beasts. But soon the Lion seemed to recover, and came to the mouth of his cave, and saw the Fox, who had been waiting outside for some time. “Why do you not come to pay your respects to me?” said the Lion to the Fox.

“I beg your Majesty’s pardon,” said the Fox, “but I noticed the track of the animals that have already come to you; and while I see many hoof-marks going in, I see none coming out. Till the animals that have entered your cave come out again I prefer to remain in the open air.”

Lesson: It is easier to get into the enemy’s toils than out again.

The Hare With Many Friends

A Hare was very popular with the other beasts who all claimed to be her friends. But one day she heard the hounds approaching and hoped to escape them by the aid of her many Friends. So, she went to the horse, and asked him to carry her away from the hounds on his back. But he declined, stating that he had important work to do for his master. “He felt sure,” he said, “that all her other friends would come to her assistance.” She then applied to the bull, and hoped that he would repel the hounds with his horns. The bull replied: “I am very sorry, but I have an appointment with a lady; but I feel sure that our friend the goat will do what you want.” The goat, however, feared that his back might do her some harm if he took her upon it. The ram, he felt sure, was the proper friend to apply to. So she went to the ram and told him the case. The ram replied: “Another time, my dear friend. I do not like to interfere on the present occasion, as hounds have been known to eat sheep as well as hares.” The Hare then applied, as a last hope, to the calf, who regretted that he was unable to help her, as he did not like to take the responsibility upon himself, as so many older persons than himself had declined the task. By this time the hounds were quite near, and the Hare took to her heels and luckily escaped.

Lesson: He that has many friends, has no friends.

The Crow and the Pitcher

A Crow, half-dead with thirst, came upon a Pitcher which had once been full of water; but when the Crow put its beak into the mouth of the Pitcher he found that only very little water was left in it, and that he could not reach far enough down to get at it. He tried, and he tried, but at last had to give up in despair. Then a thought came to him, and he took a pebble and dropped it into the Pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped it into the Pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped that into the Pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped that into the Pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped that into the Pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped that into the Pitcher. At last, at last, he saw the water mount up near him, and after casting in a few more pebbles he was able to quench his thirst and save his life.

Lesson: Little by little does the trick. And, necessity if the mother of invention.

What are you thoughts on the tales? What other lessons might you learn from them? When you feel let down by friends, what do you do? Do you first assess the situation like the fox, or do you go in blindly  and trusting like the beasts? Do you panic in tough situations, or are you innovative with your solutions? Which characters do you liken yourself to in the fables? Let’s keep the conversation going, please comment.

Photo Credit: Public Domain

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• Clever Crows Prove Aesop’s Fable Is More Than Fiction (wired.com)

A few weeks ago I did a favor for someone and they didn’t say thanks, which ticked me off. Originally I was going to charge him but he couldn’t afford to pay, since he needed the information badly,  I gave it to him for free. I was complaining to a friend and she instructed me to let it go because another person will do a kind deed for me. I think the thing which irked me the most is that he behaved as if he could afford my service, and when I realized that he couldn’t, I gave it to him and he then behaved as if the service wasn’t valuable. I took my friend’s advice and let go.

But, while going through book reviews I wrote a few years ago, I came across the review of Anyway: The Paradoxical Commandments by Kent M. Keith. I really needed to be reminded of The 10 Paradoxical Commandments. This post is as much for me as it is for you. We (myself included) should never do things expecting gratitude or praise in return. Please let me know what you think.

Here are The 10 Paradoxical Commandments, which are an excerpt from Anyway: The Paradoxical Commandments, Kent M. Keith:

The 10 Paradoxical Commandments

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centred. Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
3. If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway.
7. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
9. People really need help but may attack you if you help them. Help people anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway

If you have never read Anyway: The Paradoxical Commandments by Kent M. Keith, pick up a copy today, it’s an easy read. The story goes that “The Paradoxical Commandments,” which was first written as a poem had hung on the wall of  Mother Theresa‘s  children’s home in Calcutta, India.

What are your thoughts about The 10 Paradoxical Commandments? Let’s keep the conversation flowing, please comment.

Image Credit: Bing via Apture

During a period of incredible change, I though that I’d revisit  email interviews I conducted a few years ago where the interviewees explained how to switch careers. Read and let me know what you think.

Simon Grant

I have walked away from a career twice. The first time I did it for love (met a woman on holiday, moved to Sweden, worked washing dishes till I got a chance to start again in a Swedish company in a new industry). The second time I simply stopped having fun in my career and so quit and went backpacking for a year with my now wife, changed country again and had to start from (almost) scratch again.

In both cases and as a general guide, I think a successful transition is about understanding that you need to “earn your stripes” with those whom you start working with. You should never expect respect. Gaining respect is not just about what you know or the decisions you make, but, about the passion that you bring to your role and how you treat your co-workers. It’s not impossible, but it’s damn hard to be successful without the support and respect of your co-workers.

Nanci Govinder

Moving from one career to another is perhaps one of the most stressful and enjoyable experiences one can have in one’s professional life. Often people do not fulfill their true desires in terms of a career as they studied to do something and are fearful of change. I have made many transitions in my professional life and loved each step–from a scientist to a career in marketing and general management, to a research associate in an international business school to currently being a coach, teacher and speaker.

Here are some tips to change careers I would like to share with you:

Be clear about what you want

Deep down, we all know what we truly desire but are too afraid to even articulate it to ourselves. To get started, write down some things that you achieved between the ages of 5-10, 10-15, 15-20, 20-25. These must be things that bring a smile to your face when you recall them.

Write it down

This is a really important step as seeing your ‘dream’ on paper, starts the process of making it a reality. If you just talk about it or think about it, it remains just that, a pipe dream.

Find role models or mentors

During this process, people close to you tend to project their fears on you and tell you what a bad idea it is and how foolish you are to leave a ‘good job with good prospects blah, blah, blah.’ Don’t listen to them. They are just projecting their fears.

Transition part-time

We all have financial commitments and obligations and it can be a big step to make dramatic changes. Find ways to ease into your new career if you can. I reduced my full-time job to three days a week and spent the other two days working on my company and creating my network. When the time came to leave, I felt confident and at ease to work full time in my company.

List your fears

We all have fears. We are afraid of failure, being embarrassed, humiliated, being successful and so on. What are you afraid of? It’s important to state your fear and to realize that fear is just a thought or belief that you have

These are the tips that Simon and Nanci would like to share with you if you decided that you wanted a career change.

Let’s keep the conversation going, please comment. If you enjoy this blog please help to spread the word. Thank you!

I have spent some time developing and refining the Invisible Mentor concept, and I thought it important that you understand some of the terminologies, and how the concept was born. One morning while walking in High Park, in the fall of 2007, “Tales of People Who Get It is your Board of Invisible Mentor” pops into my consciousness. I quickly pulled out my mini notebook and pen out of my back pocket and jotted down my epiphany. I had been thinking about how to describe my book for a few months. Board of Invisible Mentors made perfect sense to me because whenever I faced a challenge, I remembered parts of the interviews that I conducted for Tales of People Who Get It and I would know exactly what to do next.

I continued with my walk, enjoying the wonders of nature. I marveled at the four cygnets (baby swans) as they struggled to learn to fly before the winter arrived. Papa and mama swan patiently watched, every now and again instructing their offspring in lessons of persistence, “If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again.”

I noticed the beaver enjoying the unseasonably warm weather as he took an early siesta in the nook of a tree. Ducks lined up in a row on a log as the birds rehearsed their cantata for the fly south. Being in touch with nature took me back to the basics of life and reminded me of the truly important things in life.

Later, I confided in a friend about my epiphany and she thought it was pure genius. She further added that the idea was ahead of its time so I should alter it to Tales of People Who Get It is your Board of Mentors. This didn’t work for me because “invisible” is what makes it so special. Discouraged I parked my idea for nearly eighteen months.

Why do we care so much about what others think, even if it sets us back? Why don’t we trust our instincts and just plough ahead? Could it be fear of going it alone?

When I started to seriously explore the concept, I discovered the article, “Invisible Mentor: Communication Theory and Lilian Katz” by Professor Karen L. Peterson from Washington State University, and later I was referred to the book The Mentor’s Spirit by Marsha Sinetar (Author of the bestselling book Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow). These two pieces of work helped me to clarify my thinking around the Invisible Mentor Concept. I am eternally grateful to Karen L. Peterson and Marsha Sinetar for their seminal works.

I think it’s important to build on the works of others, instead of re-inventing the wheel. That’s the mindset of innovative thinkers, inventors, and those who have helped to shape the world.

Over the past seven months, I have massaged and caressed Peterson’s and Sinetar’s ideas and blended them with mine, to form something new. I am always evolving, so my ideas are continually evolving and becoming better.  Here are the key terms.

Invisible Mentors

Unique leaders who we can learn things from by observing, as well as reading books written by and about them, listening to interviews, presentations and speeches given by or about them, and studying and reflecting on ideas, tools, and models they have developed/created.

Absorbent Learners

People who know how to intelligently consume information, and then apply the concepts they learn about, to their situations. To do this, among their peers, they tend to “listen, discuss, verify, explain, and use multiple strategies and styles” to develop a solid understanding of the subject, and creatively make connections. Absorbent learner is another name for mentee or protégé.

Mentoring Circles/Buddy Club

Usually has about four to six members, with one member who is more senior to the rest acting as the leader. In the context that I am using mentoring circles, the members would be peers.

Co-mentors/Buddies

Peers who support each other by pooling their mental capacities to achieve a greater good. Together they act as a mini think tank where they share ideas, solve problems and brainstorm. The relationship is also reciprocal in nature, where co-mentors assume the role of both student and teacher.

Please keep the conversation flowing, please provide comments and suggestions regarding things that I may be missing.

Photo Credit: Bing via Apture

Many times we face problems that we think are unique to us, but similar problems have already been solved in a related or unrelated industry. How do we cross sectors to see what’s going on in their backyard, so that we may learn from them? How can we cross pollinate our ideas for superior solutions?

I love Fast Company magazine, and I was completely mesmerized while reading their recent article “Does Architecture Have a Foot Fetish?” by Michael Cannell. Cannell made an analogy between shoes and buildings, “What are shoes, after all, but mini buildings for your feet?” Do you agree with that statement? After reading the article and seeing some of the shoe designs, I will never look at shoes the same way again.

Now that the economy is slow, some architects have been applying their knowledge in building design, to designing shoes. Take a quick look at “Does Architecture Have a Foot Fetish?” and tell me what you think. The first shoe design is quite classy in my opinion, but the others are too futuristic, Star Trekky for me (no offense Star Trek fans).

In another Fast Company article, “A Problem-Solver’s Guide to Copycatting” by Dan & Chip Heath (authors of the bestseller Made to Stick), they present a few case studies where executives used nature (biomimicry) to solve organizational problems that appeared unsolvable.

How can you cross pollinate our ideas for superior solutions? And how can you build a body of general information that you can merge with specific information when problem solving? Simply read up on topics that you wouldn’t usually read: biomimicry, botany, biology, zoology, astronomy, agriculture, philosophy, science and so on. And read a few magazine that you usually wouldn’t read as Futurist, Utne, Skeptical Enquirer. And make sure to take a look at what other industries have done and are doing.

Even though the grass is seldom greener on the other side, it’s worth it to take a look. Please keep this conversation going, provide comments.

Photo credit: Flickr

Further Reading

Does Architecture Have a Foot Fetish?

A Problem-Solver’s Guide to Copycatting